Love: Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little...

By N O - 27/05/2014 18:47 - Canada - Granton

Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 387

You deserved it 6 967

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

YouTubers must be stopped

By TuT - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I found my husband in the bathtub, which was filled with blood-red water, motionless and staring blankly at the ceiling. I started screaming and crying, and he burst into laughter at his "hilarious" prank. He only seemed regretful that his video camera hadn't been recording properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 593

You deserved it 4 301

Spooky

By Scaredwitless - 28/01/2011 04:35 - United States

Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 914

You deserved it 6 020

By Anonymous - 29/03/2011 23:58 - Canada

Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 943

You deserved it 3 987

By I_Has_A_Fishy - 10/07/2012 19:33 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 688

You deserved it 3 457

Overheard musings

By thanks hun - 07/05/2020 20:00

Today, my husband came out of the bathroom and screamed, "Call 911 because I just murdered this motherfucking toilet!” then laughed hysterically at his own stupid joke. I was on a Zoom meeting at the time. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 997

You deserved it 276

By toni405 - 21/07/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 773

You deserved it 11 474

Psychopath's joke

By hannieannie - 20/11/2019 01:00

Today, I’m still recovering from last night. I fell asleep before my boyfriend. He thought it would be funny to stand at the bottom of the bed with a knife and wake me up. I screamed so much that I wet myself and had a panic attack. He recorded the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 039

You deserved it 258

By Shantwozzlah - 26/03/2012 16:15 - United States - Kissimmee

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 853

You deserved it 3 589

OK Tyler Durden

By Anonymous - 13/06/2012 20:38 - Netherlands

Today, I had to take my husband to the hospital. He and his friends got the bright idea of recording a re-enactment of a scene from Fight Club for a YouTube video. It ended as soon as my husband caught a fist to the gut and started violently puking all over our basement floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 895

You deserved it 2 551

Single shot

By irulan - 14/01/2020 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I farted so loudly in bed and I woke up my husband. Startled, he thought that someone was entered in our room and fired a shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 540

You deserved it 599

xBOGGSx 3

Tuesday 27 May 2014 23:13

Haha why wouldn't you just laugh it off? I think it's hilarious!

FrenchMixer 9

Tuesday 27 May 2014 23:14

So funny is your husband!

Comments

extinct_dodo 18

Thursday 29 May 2014 19:44

Your husband rocks!

hordriss 14

Thursday 29 May 2014 20:35

Cruel..... but a really terrific prank. Now over to you to work out how to get him back!

stiffster 5

Thursday 29 May 2014 22:17

lighten up

metalhead88 9

Friday 30 May 2014 23:52

Ha your husband is awesome lol

missizz_fml 7

Sunday 1 June 2014 3:43

I sincerely hope you exacted revenge!

ebrainer1 9

Sunday 1 June 2014 19:00

Get his ass back with some Hair dye shampoo.

lollypop624 11

Friday 6 June 2014 23:34

AMAZING prank!! You're so lucky to have a husband like him!! Hilarious!!!

Epickitty58 29

Tuesday 24 June 2014 17:37

Just hope it's not next week's featured video.

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 12 August 2014 23:45

I should do this prank.

Nerd4Life231 4

Thursday 4 September 2014 2:47

Would it be bad if i said I wanted to watch the video.

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The Top

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 443

You deserved it 3 015

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 743

You deserved it 17 913

The Top

Today, I bought tomato sauce and tomato paste to make rigatoni. Forgot to buy the meat and the pasta. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 966

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 284

You deserved it 4 241

Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 229

You deserved it 4 695

Today, my bank sent me a message, saying that they'd disabled my account. To reactivate it, I need the account number, and I can't find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 796

You deserved it 256

Today, I found out that my ex-husband just had a baby with his new partner. We only split up a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 345

You deserved it 2 411

Today, I found out I'm 9 weeks pregnant. I got on Facebook to message my baby daddy, but was stopped in my tracks by his mugshot plastered all over my news feed for an alleged meth distribution investigation. He was already on parole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 518

You deserved it 4 711