Intimacy: Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get...

By captainocd - 19/08/2010 19:16 - United States

Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 650

You deserved it 85 115

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/07/2011 05:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 747

You deserved it 8 518

By whatswrongwithit?:( - 30/09/2012 19:37 - United States - Chicago

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 475

You deserved it 3 671

By Eddie - 07/08/2011 19:43 - Israel

Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 907

You deserved it 4 923

OCD

By Anonymous - 04/11/2009 13:53 - Australia

Today, I decided to dress up sexy for my boyfriend. I put on cute undies and a corset because they made the most of my assets. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "The colours don't match." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 523

You deserved it 5 760

By Anonymous - 11/09/2009 17:04 - United States

Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 293

You deserved it 4 017

Gotcha

By Embarassed - 23/11/2012 06:14 - United States - Kent

Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 890

You deserved it 15 997

Why would you do that?

By HughGorgy - 20/03/2009 05:37 - Canada

Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched, "What are you doing with my panties!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 387

You deserved it 103 233

By DuChaillu - 27/01/2010 07:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to perform a strip tease for me. As he was stripping out of his clothes, he took his shirt and then pants off first. He was wearing zebra striped knee high socks and underwear. I burst out laughing. He left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 178

You deserved it 27 861

Turn me on

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 16:59 - United States - Meriden

Today, my girlfriend wanted to try having sex despite her serious body image issues. Unfortunately, I couldn't get it up due to how utterly terrified she looked. Now no matter what I say, she thinks it's all because her body is hideous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 243

You deserved it 2 953

By fruitoftheloom - 09/03/2015 05:13 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, my girlfriend took off my pants for the first time. She was more impressed by the pattern on my boxers than by my cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 966

You deserved it 7 323

kbaker90 0

Thursday 19 August 2010 23:43

Two things: 1. Poor girl. No wonder she's self-conscious. 2. OP, your man card, please. *holds out hand*

lazerdude07 0

Thursday 19 August 2010 23:41

what a jerk, if you gave her some compliments she might have higher confidence

Comments

apocalyptic_1125 0

Saturday 10 September 2011 11:56

Why do you think she is self-conscious? Because of shit like that.

Rebel4life2013 0

Tuesday 27 September 2011 18:25

U dumb ass really? That's all u could come up with idiot!

piwikiwi93 0

Friday 25 November 2011 7:13

How did she react to that one genius?

sorrowevicteon 9

Tuesday 20 December 2011 9:38

If you grinned while saying it she might have taken as you trying to be cute...

mrshr3dalot 11

Friday 13 January 2012 7:23

So it was bad?

sasha_is_my_name 5

Thursday 2 February 2012 7:07

Ass hole

Late_night83 25

Thursday 1 March 2012 7:38

Asshole!

merrielp 13

Friday 22 June 2012 20:43

Wow? Why are you worrying about unimportant things? Ydi quit being a douche

funnyprick007 1

Thursday 30 August 2012 2:51

lmao you had to state the obvious, I understand

xRezSynn 15

Monday 22 April 2013 18:11

I'm guessing that was the last strip tease that she did for you?

Keywords

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Today, the girl I love who friendzoned me called to talk. She shared the marvelous things she'd done for her friend's birthday, then said, "You had a recent birthday too." Then she laughed. We'd talked multiple times without her mentioning my birthday. She ignored it on Facebook. Time for no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 193

Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML

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Today, I was out to dinner with my boyfriend and his parents. It was my first time meeting them, so I was a bit nervous. As we were talking, I accidentally let out a loud burp. His parents looked at me in shock, and my boyfriend just laughed and said, "Well, she's certainly comfortable around you two." FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 209

Today, I got in a fight with my boyfriend. I sent him a long message pouring my heart out about how hurt I am that he constantly ignores me or responds to almost everything I say in monosyllables. He texted back "ok". FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 248

You deserved it 3 774

Today, my friend brought four full grown hemp plants home. They cost $100 a pop; meanwhile he still owes $25 from a Lyft ride he claims he can’t pay back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 133

Today, apparently my bathroom breaks have perfect comedic timing. My very religious parents were praying in the living room. I quietly snuck into the bathroom that's less than ten yards from where they're at. Right as they finished praying and saying "Amen" I let off a massive fart, and my dad burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 109

Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 471

You deserved it 31 214

Today, my boyfriend and I went to his best friend’s birthday party. He got her red roses, a necklace and $100 Victoria’s Secret Gift Card. This year he forgot my birthday, gave me a hug and told me to leave his apartment because he had homework to do. We’ve been together for two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 450

You deserved it 238

Same thing different taste

OCD

Gotcha

Why would you do that?

Turn me on

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