Miscellaneous: Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

By Jess - 30/05/2011 15:46 - United States

Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 085

You deserved it 5 036

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Same thing different taste

Inappropriate

By Pandistoteles - 14/04/2015 21:17 - United States

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonald's but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 540

You deserved it 2 729

By cookie_lover_xx - 15/10/2015 06:24 - United States - Chandler

Today, my mom ended up having a midlife crisis. She decided it was finally time to get those tight leather pants that she has always wanted, and is now planning on putting a stripper pole in her room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 567

You deserved it 2 054

By dancingqueef - 22/06/2016 02:39 - United States - Kingston

Today, my mom told me to break a leg before performing in my dancing school's show. I really did break part of my leg while performing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 756

You deserved it 1 195

By DrunkenMum - 20/07/2019 12:00

Today, I’m on holiday with my mum. She got so pissed, she fell over on the dance floor at the children’s disco, then had to rely on a stranger to keep her upright so I could go get the car to take her home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 538

You deserved it 111

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 686

You deserved it 122

By Messiahman - 30/10/2011 01:31 - United States

Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 928

You deserved it 34 063

Sips unsee juice

By Facepalm2020 - 21/06/2020 23:01

Today, my mom asked me what twerking was. When I said that it was a club dance, trying to get out of telling her what it actually was, she begged me to teach her how to do it. My mom complained to my dad, who grounded me for not teaching her to twerk her ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 585

You deserved it 349

By Anonymous - 26/07/2019 04:00

Today, I came out of my bedroom to find my mom doing yoga in my hallway. Naked. She doesn't seem to think there's any problem with this. It's my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 873

You deserved it 146

By bob - 05/02/2011 12:02 - United States

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 156

You deserved it 4 220

By f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States

Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 191

You deserved it 727

khaya 9

Monday 30 May 2011 18:58

Well it could have been worse, she could have started to strip and then demand money.

barmeywashere 0

Monday 30 May 2011 18:58

Speechless o.o

Comments

ThatRandomGurl13 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 0:39

wow

scars_souvenirs 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 0:46

damn, that sucks

HeyMrsWest 2

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:16

i hope she was a MILF 

Yessyy 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:17

don't stop get get it

cola1462 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:34

0_0 wow is all i have to say

ArabFML 3

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:37

Your mom is cool

Lolpizza_fml 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:37

sounds like a lovely mom!

cymruambyth 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:53

did she never tell you she has a second job?

thepaisan532 3

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:55

Soooooo... what park do you go to?

thepaisan532 3

Tuesday 31 May 2011 1:55

Soooooo... what park do you go to?

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The Top

Today, I found out that the 2 loud "firework booms" I heard were actually a guy shooting his dog on the unfinished road behind my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 578

You deserved it 3 053

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 787

You deserved it 22 727

The Top

Today, I asked my boyfriend if there's a reason why he has never gone down on me. He responded, "Your back door is too close to your front door and it creeps me out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 045

You deserved it 5 136

Today, my fiancée wrecked my car so I had to use my other car to pick her up. Ten minutes after I did, my other car broke down in the middle of the road and I had to get it towed. My insurance covers none of these incidents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 219

Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 575

You deserved it 9 974

Today, I decided to go for a swim in a river to cool off. Not having a bathing suit, I went in nude. After a refreshing swim, and coming back to shore completely naked, I was greeted by a shocked young woman walking her dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 1 404

Today, I found out that I was being laid off via an email that wasn't even spell checked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 959

You deserved it 2 301

Today, a customer brought his cat in to be euthanized. I told him to "have a nice day" as he was leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 569

You deserved it 4 412

Same thing different taste

Inappropriate

Sips unsee juice

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