Miscellaneous: Today, my mother asked me how pasta is harvested. She actually... - FML

By a - 12/05/2015 16:37 - United Kingdom - Ascot

Today, my mother asked me how pasta is harvested. She actually thought it grew out of the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 724

You deserved it 2 544

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Masterchef

By WhatHaveIDone - 24/03/2021 11:01

Today, my daughter tried to make pasta by putting a pot on the stove, pouring the noodles in without adding water, and turning on the stove. Then she asked me, "How come these aren’t getting soft like when you make them?" She’s 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 712

Now we're cooking

By Anonymous - 05/05/2023 15:00 - Canada

Today, I made homemade pasta from scratch. I spent hours kneading the dough, rolling it out, and cutting it into perfect strips. When I went to cook it, I realized that I forgot to add salt to the dough. The pasta tasted like damp cardboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 273

By Anonymous - 22/06/2019 18:02

Today, I offered to help my mother-in-law boil noodles for some noodle soup. She loudly said, "You know how!?" I'm a chef. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 621

You deserved it 142

Gullible's travels

By Anonymous - 20/01/2015 00:45 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my 15 year-old sister asked which animal rice comes from. She believed every word when my mum told her it's harvested from tiny cows in Asia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 581

You deserved it 2 798

By Cogibbt - 03/08/2019 12:00 - Canada

Today, my mom found out that paper is made from trees. She read it on a garbage truck. I then had to explain to her how it's made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 556

You deserved it 142

By damnthedog - 19/01/2013 07:40 - Australia - Wollongong

Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 300

You deserved it 7 366

Yummy

By Veggie dinner - 01/07/2024 16:00 - Germany - Essen

Today, I was boiling pasta and tasting it every now and then too see if it was done. As an afterthought, I threw in some lentil pasta as well. Only after tasting a few more times did I notice the maggots that were now slowly rising in the boiling water. I didn't expect that much protein in those lentils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 145

Recycling at its finest

By Anonymous - 09/10/2022 16:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having a vegetarian meal at my date's house. She was very proud because she grew all the veggies herself; she even made the fertiliser herself. I was halfway through the meal before I asked what she meant by "made her own fertiliser." It was human shit; her own human shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 534

You deserved it 239

Pica?

By Anonymous - 21/06/2021 17:59

Today, my mom ate some flowers without knowing if they were safe. Turns out they are slightly poisonous and she had an upset stomach, but she will be fine. Her excuse? "I didn't know it had poison." I had to explain that's exactly why you don't eat plants you don't know are poisonous or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 97

By Anonymous - 23/08/2011 02:17 - United States

Today, I had a mild allergic reaction from eating pasta salad. I told my mom that I might be allergic to the parsley, since it was the only ingredient that I don't eat often. She made me eat a sprig of it to "make sure." Now my face is covered in hives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 731

You deserved it 4 559

Next

Top comments

Hoopachi 19

Wednesday 13 May 2015 0:33

That's prePASTArus!

unknowncat 6

Wednesday 13 May 2015 0:40

Well, the grain that pasta is made from goes in the ground.

Comments

MetalSonicCD 13

Wednesday 13 May 2015 1:47

Noodles are made from dough, dough contains flour which is derived from wheat. So she isn't completely wrong

suri23 11

Wednesday 13 May 2015 2:33

It grows in trees, lol! http://youtu.be/tVo_wkxH9dU

AggieMike77 12

Wednesday 13 May 2015 4:18

Put your mother in a home now... not just any home, a home for the incurable idiots.

Cslagem 10

Wednesday 13 May 2015 4:25

To be fair pasta is literally flour+ eggs

cappellaaa 23

Wednesday 13 May 2015 5:06

Oh sweet jesus that's awful

nicole_is_bunny 15

Wednesday 13 May 2015 5:15

I was once convinced by a friend that spaghetti grew out of trees :-

Puppys_Doll 28

Wednesday 13 May 2015 6:31

BBC actually had a hoax about growing pasta on trees, so it isn't so ridiculous if she heard about this but wasn't told it was a hoax. I don't remember when it happened though

italyball 12

Wednesday 13 May 2015 6:35

And I thought it was bad when some customers came in to my mcdonalds asking if the male or the female determines the sex of the baby.

spookyjohnson 7

Wednesday 13 May 2015 6:54

Well most pasta is made with wheat flour, which *does* grow out of the ground...

False_Stupidity 41

Wednesday 13 May 2015 7:05

Not one that should be asked of McDonalds employees though #50.

1
2
3
4
5

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Haircut Cute Relatable Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, my wife waited until we’d been married for two weeks to tell me she has a mountain of credit card debt that she’s been hiding from me. This explains why she insisted the mortgage and car be in my name, her credit score is so low that it’s almost a double digit FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 145

Today, I was upset after my boyfriend and I broke up. My best friend heard and told me she would be right over. Three hours of waiting later, she stumbles in wasted. She had been at the bar, with my ex, making sure he was okay. For me, I just got a list of all the drinks she had that night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 084

You deserved it 2 489

The Top

Today, I was feeling rebellious, I decided to procrastinate instead of studying for my really important English test tomorrow. I was having a pretty good time until I realized my idea of procrastinating was cleaning my TI-83 graphing calculator with rubbing alcohol and Q-tips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 930

You deserved it 53 346

Today, I came home to hear my girlfriend break up with me, over the answering machine, with my entire family in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 620

You deserved it 2 390

Today, as I was leaving for my chemistry exam, I stepped on one of the countless sheets of chemistry notes that littered the floor following last night's studying. I managed to slip and knock myself out in my own living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 208

You deserved it 6 578

Today, after weeks of my crazy girlfriend avoiding me because she knew I wanted to break up with her, I had no option but to do it by text. She told all my friends, who now think I'm a coward who isn't man enough to break up in person. They didn't even ask for my side of the story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 451

You deserved it 5 069

Today, I found out my daughter is tolerating abuse from her boyfriend, all because, “He’s 6’4, has dark hair, and green eyes.” Apparently, that outweighs him treating her like shit. I don’t know what else to tell her to convince her to leave him, or it’s a matter of time before I see her in a coffin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 141

Today, the alarm clock downstairs has been going off since 3am. The apartment belongs to two other students. They've gone home. Only 3 more days left to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 235

You deserved it 2 301