Miscellaneous: Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level... - FML

By Motha - 09/04/2014 05:17 - United States - West Jordan

Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I'd done with my pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 604

You deserved it 50 478

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 04:31 - United States - Havertown

Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 494

You deserved it 1 513

Sins of the Mother

By speedster - 24/06/2021 06:01 - United States

Today, I asked my science teacher if he'd had my mom when she went to my high school. He took one look at me, glared, and said, "Oh yeah, I remember HER." I have that class every day the rest of the year. Thanks a lot, Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 294

By NittanyMangini - 26/05/2016 16:37 - United States

Today, I was taking a biology final and was just randomly tapping my pencil. My teacher thought I was somehow communicating with the person next to me, and decided to fail me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 294

You deserved it 1 520

By Anonymous - 12/12/2009 00:45 - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 422

You deserved it 40 007

Huge balls

By Anonymous - 10/10/2021 19:04 - United States

Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 296

You deserved it 147

By sciencenat - 14/01/2016 06:36 - France - V?lizy-villacoublay

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 908

You deserved it 5 114

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 132

You deserved it 4 928

Art critic

By Anonymous - 09/08/2009 00:02 - United States

Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 092

You deserved it 3 543

By f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States

Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 190

You deserved it 727

By idkmybffjill? - 13/02/2009 04:12 - United States

Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 572

You deserved it 49 048

Next

Top comments

Lebeaugars95 20

Wednesday 9 April 2014 15:31

guess who the teacher called after that comment

SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10

Wednesday 9 April 2014 15:14

All you had to do was go to class with a pencil. I am sure McDonalds is hiring though.

Comments

yourwifelovesme 25

Wednesday 9 April 2014 22:38

With your maturity level, no wonder yours is pencil sized. YDI 100%

blahblah5743794 19

Wednesday 9 April 2014 22:59

GFY

Skyzeri 20

Wednesday 9 April 2014 23:31

I didn't even know that people used that phrase anymore.

LatvianPride 16

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:09

YDI, grow up.

peak4u 10

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:11

It's 2014, sincerely worried seeing the yo mama phase was over a good 10 years ago

mcmacmick97 9

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:18

Some people don't have a mom anymore. My mom died when I was 11 and it really hurts when someone says your mom or plays the yo mama card. I hope your teacher got you suspended and you feel like a real ******* asshole.

DatWeirdoDoe 9

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:47

Wow i bet that teacher called someones mom

nokturn_fml 11

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:55

Dude that's awesome, sadly there is a time and place for those jokes...

davincidasecond 24

Thursday 10 April 2014 2:59

You know who else's obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level ... ?

Blackhawk706 23

Thursday 10 April 2014 3:18

The first time I read this I saw penis, much more entertaining that way

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I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 16

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 052

You deserved it 8 438

The Top

Today, I went to a very important job interview. I was so nervous that I passed out right in front of the interviewer's desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 462

You deserved it 2 449

Today, we bought our first home after months of searching and years of saving. It's directly in the path of Hurricane Irma and may be destroyed before we even get the chance to move in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 967

You deserved it 420

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 379

You deserved it 53 693

Today, my mother looked me dead in the face and said, "I have failed as a parent." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 227

You deserved it 7 112

Today, my friends held a roast for my birthday, as per my request. They went pretty hard and I got a little uncomfortable. Afterwards, I told them that their jokes were a little too far, and they said all of their roasts were 100% genuine, and they just needed an excuse to tell me their problems with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 1 621

Today, I had a long call with my crush, the only person I have been in regular contact with for the past year. He regularly calls me to check up on me, and really cares about my interests. I'm not sure if he likes me back, or is just being friendly, and I'm too scared to ask him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 511