Health: Today, my roommates decided to do some experimental baking. To...

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By sendhelp - 03/08/2015 05:31 - United States - Provo

Today, my roommates decided to do some experimental baking. To be supportive, I tried one of their creations. I've been alternating between vomiting and diarrhea for the past hour. My jaw is sore from vomiting, and I can barely muster the energy to flush between "switching sides" anymore. FML

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You deserved it 2 460

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Same thing different taste

By AW - 10/01/2011 12:48

Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 667

You deserved it 3 040

By Anonymous - 18/05/2011 07:26 - United States

Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 376

You deserved it 9 340

Two rooms, two atmospheres

By Anonymous - 26/11/2020 16:58

Today, I tried to cook a nice meal for my sister's friends. It turned out perfect and they enjoyed it, while I was in the bathroom throwing up for two hours due to food poisoning. FML

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You deserved it 151

By Rayvyn - 21/10/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 889

You deserved it 7 374

By Anonymous - 16/04/2013 23:13 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 532

You deserved it 4 033

Gutsy move

By Anonymous - 22/10/2022 06:00 - United States

Today, dealing with anxiety and depression, I finally got up the energy to bake. I chose homemade enchiladas. I then spent the whole day walking from the toilet to the nearest couch (and vice versa), feeling like my intestines were going to blow. No more enchiladas for me for a long time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 213

No soup for you

By jnisla - 11/10/2013 22:44 - United States - Conway

Today, I had horrible morning sickness, but being starving, I had some canned soup. My husband soon came into the room and commented on how the leeks in the soup looked like chunks of vomit. The visual caused me to vomit all over the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 248

You deserved it 3 452

By Anonymous - 18/12/2010 05:16 - United States

Today, after struggling with anorexia for months, I got food poisoning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 134

You deserved it 7 551

Living the dream

By notyourcleaner - 13/01/2015 11:06 - Malaysia - Puchong

Today, my new roommate puked into the sink and all over the bathroom floor, before passing out on her bed. Apparently, she was awake enough to wash her own face but not clean up her vomit. We share the bathroom. This is the second time already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 158

You deserved it 2 698

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - 23/02/2015 17:56 - United States

Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 659

You deserved it 5 943

Rosebudx 32

Monday 3 August 2015 14:00

Hold a bucket or trash can while sitting on the pot. And what the hell were they baking that had this effect?!

Cads1 24

Monday 3 August 2015 13:59

At least vomiting works the abs. Think of it as a failed way to exercise.

Comments

iwanttogotoparis 26

Monday 3 August 2015 14:28

Maybe you should do the cooking from now on

arrowgold 19

Monday 3 August 2015 14:31

Were you the only one to try this? Or is everyone in the house this sick?

NeatNit 32

Monday 3 August 2015 14:33

cancer, aids and smallpox

peacheso 31

Monday 3 August 2015 14:53

I wonder if it had the same effect on them.

LegionRapier61 8

Monday 3 August 2015 15:05

Just lay in the tub with the shower running... oh and make sure that your ass is pointing towards the drain.

KingLewisII 34

Monday 3 August 2015 16:53

yeah because sitting in a tub full of shit and vomit would make things so much better

who_even_cares02 10

Monday 3 August 2015 15:11

I wouldn't eat their food anymore.

pixierara 28

Monday 3 August 2015 15:25

It kinda makes me sad to see people older than me who have no idea how to actually make food. But I'm sorry about your situation

Soloman212 28

Monday 3 August 2015 16:14

To be fair, 14 years is much older for a cat than for a human. Cooking is nonetheless an impressive trick for a cat. When I was 14 all I ever did was sling my feces at passerbys.