Health: Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out,...

By taydean - 26/05/2011 21:31 - United States

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 268

You deserved it 66 596

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By NaniNarcotic - 16/08/2011 10:17 - Australia

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 881

You deserved it 73 489

By Krystyn Gareau - 09/09/2011 04:10 - Canada

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 098

You deserved it 13 704

By Anonymous - 21/05/2011 14:18 - United Kingdom

Today, I went out with my best friend and her hot brother. Upon our exit out of the restaurant I walked right into the glass door and rebounded back off it. The whole restaurant was silent as I shamefully walked out only to trip on the curb outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 471

You deserved it 7 810

By lulabell - 19/05/2009 02:07 - United States

Today, I waved at a cute guy when I was leaving Wendy's. I then ran into a curb, spilled my Frosty, and hit my head on the steering wheel. I turned around and both the cute guy and his dad were in hysterics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 251

You deserved it 43 940

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 23:18 - United States

Today, I came home to find my little sister had decided to play hopscotch under our carport. Feeling a small childish urge, I decided to hop on one leg to the front door. I tripped and fell, slicing my knee open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 722

You deserved it 21 318

By Anonymous - 09/06/2019 04:00

Today, while browsing through Walmart, I slipped on a piece of clothing and fell backwards into an obese lady’s butt. When I landed, she farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 968

You deserved it 294

By shit - 26/01/2014 18:20 - United States - South Holland

Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 111

You deserved it 46 794

Patsy

By Anonymous - 28/04/2022 12:00

Today, my brother ran in, handed me a spatula, and told me to stand still. Barely a second later, our sister came tearing in the house with a fresh, raised welt on her ass cheek in the shape of said spatula, saw me holding said spatula, and kicked my ass up and down the house until I escaped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 174

Pranks are terrible

By Anonymous - 05/08/2021 23:01 - United States - Humble

Today, my sister threw my water bottle as a joke. When I stepped off the bleachers, my right foot lost its footing and my other foot followed. Now I have two sprained ankles at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 82

By eun - 09/04/2009 01:42 - Canada

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 255

You deserved it 12 441

dreamering 16

Friday 27 May 2011 0:59

I think # 3 was behind the door.

Jorcar 8

Friday 27 May 2011 0:53

Way to be random.

Comments

eff5 0

Friday 27 May 2011 0:55

dumbass

msbosslady 0

Friday 27 May 2011 1:51

Ditto... who does shit like that? Oh, wait OP does....

OhLohd111 11

Friday 27 May 2011 7:02

yeah, what a dumb ass... it didn't bounce op right back up for an fml-turned-epic win.

katoom4 0

Friday 27 May 2011 12:36

more like numb ass (lame attempt at a joke I know)

catrav77 0

Friday 27 May 2011 0:57

Cause that would have been SO funny if you had done it successfully.... Not.

Captain_Obvious2_fml 6

Friday 27 May 2011 0:59

Fail. Words can not describe the fail that has happened.

fooch 0

Friday 27 May 2011 1:49

except fail obviously

Captain_Obvious2_fml 6

Friday 27 May 2011 3:12

not even. thats not even fail enough

thebestof1984 0

Friday 27 May 2011 0:59

and you didn't deserve this why?....

quadder 0

Friday 27 May 2011 1:01

ydi for pulling off an epic fail

hunterhound 0

Friday 27 May 2011 1:01

that crashed and burned

awesomeabs 0

Friday 27 May 2011 1:02

wtf were u thinking ur obviously not doing anything historically correct...Spartans kicked people into a gigantic hole

DmF288 14

Friday 27 May 2011 1:03

You were really on the pulse of current pop-cultural humor there. Plan to make jokes about "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" while that's still popular, too?