Stalker and Miscellaneous: Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old...

By beablue18 - 04/07/2011 00:27 - Germany

Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 775

You deserved it 2 989

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Betrayal

By sisterly love - 14/08/2013 21:13 - United States - Santa Clara

Today, my sister admitted to selling pages of my diary to my old boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 206

You deserved it 4 162

By DJ - 11/12/2011 01:01 - United States

Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 209

You deserved it 2 860

By SingleAgain - 03/08/2012 06:22 - United States - Saukville

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 938

You deserved it 3 107

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 20:25 - United States - Houston

Today, I found out who's been stealing clothes from me during swim practice. She called me a liar, despite wearing one of my sweaters, which has my initials stitched into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 532

You deserved it 2 785

By IHateMySister - 02/01/2016 10:36 - Denmark - Kirke-hyllinge

Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 836

You deserved it 1 362

Sike

By Anonymous - 20/11/2020 23:02

Today, my 35 year-old sister, who has no job or life, came downstairs and told me she knows I can hear her thoughts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 760

You deserved it 79

By Anonymous - 09/05/2012 22:09 - Egypt - Cairo

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 211

You deserved it 3 386

It is though

By Timv86 - 16/02/2010 08:18 - Australia

Today, I went to the shops with my little sister. We had to walk through the lingerie section of the store to get to another part. My sister then yelled at the top of her voice, "Stop following me, you freak." I had security escort me out of the store, and got many dirty looks. She thought it was hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 989

You deserved it 3 093

By meep - 23/12/2009 16:05 - United States

Today, I found out where my $300 worth of American Eagle and Hollister clothes had disappeared to. My 16 year old sister shredded them with scissors, took pictures of it for her Myspace and said that I deserved it for being a "conformist." All her "internet friends" said it was awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 772

You deserved it 12 331

Stiched up

By familyofpsychos - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Elkhorn

Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 889

You deserved it 2 451

orphinz 3

Monday 4 July 2011 8:34

I've almost found you :)

ifailplzinsultme 0

Monday 4 July 2011 8:33

A greyhound is stalking you? Woah!

Comments

Archie92 0

Monday 4 July 2011 11:18

Omg tell me why I think you're talking about my cousin Julie? She loves you Tom! And Katie sold em' to Julie for 20 bucks a piece.

DuRpY 5

Monday 4 July 2011 11:26

soooo....does that make her a bitch?

Amburito 0

Monday 4 July 2011 11:47

Oh God... Run OP D:

madhukar 3

Monday 4 July 2011 11:50

buy mace.

frecktured 14

Monday 4 July 2011 11:52

bring a pepper spray with you at all times LOL

ChiddyBANGr 13

Monday 4 July 2011 12:44

Oooh, haha. that crazy bitch. See what I did there?

iBookFlippa 2

Monday 4 July 2011 13:40

wear axe no one will go within 10 feet of you and she won't be able to find you until your sister sells her your deodorant

Enigmax2514 7

Monday 4 July 2011 13:48

man she sounds like a creepy desperate psycho... then again all stalkers are...

SteelCladAngel 0

Monday 4 July 2011 14:58

well when the bitch finds you throw her a milk bone and tell her to 'sit! stay!' then...run away.

jfarrow9703 11

Monday 4 July 2011 15:17

maybe you should give her a chance, and when it comes time for bed, tell her OPEM YO MOUTH BIIIIITCH

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Work Mental health Awkward Relatable AITA Am I overreacting? Love Social Media Annoying Family Intimacy Sex Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Animals Dogs Cute Sleep Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, my estranged wife threatened to slit her wrist with a razor blade if I did not send her $50,000. She sent me a picture of her pressing a Gillette Safety razor to her wrist. It looked like she was getting ready to shave her perpetually hairy arms. She never was the sharpest knife in the drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 77

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 744

You deserved it 17 914

The Top

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 610

You deserved it 7 653

Today, after being hit by a car, I got up and hobbled to work instead of the hospital because no one else would cover my management shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 252

You deserved it 403

Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I told him, he impatiently said, "Is it over yet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 554

You deserved it 6 171

Today, I had a job interview today after being unemployed for months. I left early but a stranger's giant SUV had me blocked in for over 2 hours. I called to explain the situation in the hope that I would be given another interview slot later in the week. I was told I clearly didn’t want the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 188

You deserved it 229

Today, I discovered that 90% of what I do still works on autopilot when I’m too tired to pay attention: Take coffee cup, walk to fridge, open fridge door, grab bottle, pour contents into coffee. The missing 10% was the fact that this particular bottle contained grapefruit juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 067

You deserved it 444

Today, I saw a spot on my computer screen. I tried to use my finger to rub it off. Then, I tried using my nail. Then I tried to windex it off. I continued scratching at it with my nail. A half hour and one scratched screen later, I realized the spot was part of the webpage I was looking at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 760

You deserved it 68 545