Kids: Today, my son said his first complete sentence: "Mommy likes...

By Anonymous - 18/04/2014 22:35 - Canada - Concord

Today, my son said his first complete sentence: "Mommy likes shit." Not only will he not stop saying it, I have no idea who taught him to say it in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 381

You deserved it 4 861

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By njh - 27/03/2015 13:29 - Ireland

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 342

You deserved it 3 612

By anonymous - 28/07/2011 05:39 - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 444

You deserved it 16 963

By CiaoBella - 20/06/2016 03:16

Today, my son said his first word, which was, "Fuck". He got it from my great aunt, who my wife was skeptical of our son meeting because she "says too many bad words". Sorry, Honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 523

You deserved it 2 767

By milf - 06/08/2012 01:10 - United States - Muncie

Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 199

You deserved it 5 248

By applesmama - 17/09/2011 04:36 - United States

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 479

You deserved it 4 687

By Anonymous - 31/07/2014 16:24 - United States - Dallas

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 247

You deserved it 7 769

Language!

By angkal2002 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, my five year-old sister won't stop saying, "Shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 565

You deserved it 3 438

By Anonymous - 19/10/2014 20:58 - United Kingdom

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 489

You deserved it 5 786

Charming...

By Anonymous - 01/06/2018 15:00

Today, my toddler is starting to realize when she has a dirty diaper. How do I know? She walked up to me with a shit covered hand, saying "Poop Mommy! Poop!!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 371

You deserved it 406

By Kelly - 02/10/2011 04:53 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 201

You deserved it 38 233

way2go 16

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:10

It could be worse. If anyone else hears it, you can turn "shit" into "chips" or something... Maybe. Kids don't speak that clearly at first anyway

xxbvbsusanxx 21

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:10

I take it since you said "first real sentence", your son isn't old enough to be told something isn't okay to say? I'm sorry OP, that sounds really horrible, but also kind of funny. :) I'm sure it won't last for a long time, he'll find something else to say.

Comments

not_a_anonomous 9

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:17

Thats a shitty situation to be in.

EdenCrystal 21

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:20

Get out. Now.

olpally 32

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:54

I wish I could punch people in the face for saying this over used and stupid ass pun.^^ As for op, your husband probably taught him. Lol.

8born8 18

Saturday 19 April 2014 7:31

WHY DID YOU HAVE TO SAY IT!?!? I CHALLENGE THE ENTIRE FML COMMUNITY to not make a 'well that's a shitty...' comment on the next fml containing the word shit. The person who fails this challenge should be bombarded with thumbs down and ridiculed for their evident lack of creative originality!!! The commenter with the most thumbs up wins the challenge and will bask in the glory of their victory and be heralded by the fml community, the same way St. George was after he slew the dragon.

arandomusernameaa 20

Saturday 19 April 2014 11:03

hate to break it to you but St George never slayed a dragon...

blissmiss17 16

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:19

Encourage him to say something else and excitedly reward him for doing so. If he doesn't get any feedback, positive or negative, from saying "mommy likes shit," he should lose interest in the phrase in no time!:)

datguy69s 21

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:25

At least it will be a funny story to tell when he gets older and he ask what were his first words

CrazyMelvin 14

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:46

Daddy or another sibling taught him

noobsatin 19

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:56

you know what they say, little kids never lie.

cook4money 9

Saturday 19 April 2014 5:57

Maybe he is saying "mommy likes it". If you say that trying to get him to eat something, he may just be repeating that. Unless someone is spending a lot of time with him and saying that, I doubt that is what he is actually saying.

cakefete2 30

Saturday 19 April 2014 6:53

That's a good point. The tongue is such an unwieldy thing. We spend our first years learning how to use it and the rest of our lives trying to control it.