Kids: Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and...

By cjay2200 - 28/08/2011 21:25 - United Kingdom

Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 171

You deserved it 9 920

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Same thing different taste

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Today, my 1-year-old son walked up to me with a disgusted look on his face. I could tell he had something in his mouth so I pulled it out. He'd been sucking on a piece of cat poop. FML

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By sdasdflkjas - 30/05/2009 04:24 - United States

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I agree, your life sucks 65 140

You deserved it 6 359

By jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

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I agree, your life sucks 5 090

You deserved it 446

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By Anonymous - 16/08/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old son put into practice the lesson I taught him yesterday, about how to use a larger piece of Play-Doh to pick up smaller bits. Unfortunately, he used this method to pick up a small bit of poo from his pants with a larger bit of poo direct from the toilet. I was an hour late for work. FML

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You deserved it 491

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By imfullthanks - 14/03/2009 23:06 - Norway

Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "How did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?" She yelled from the other room, "You know that little plate with the red stripe?" I was eating off it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 679

You deserved it 7 670

By George Saunders - 21/03/2012 04:06 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML

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By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 243

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iAmScrubs 19

Monday 29 August 2011 8:56

At least he didn't flush it down because then you would have to call a plumber.

herop 0

Monday 29 August 2011 8:51

Poor plum, poor mom

Comments

iBilal 0

Monday 29 August 2011 10:28

we don't care if your son is eating a plum

RainbowHeadache 2

Monday 29 August 2011 10:29

YDI for not letting him finish telling you why it was wet but you have a decent kid if he doesn't eat pee plums. My little cousin licks things off the concrete & probably would have just eaten that plum without washing it, so I say your kid is off to a good start.

mythicafairy 2

Monday 29 August 2011 10:36

Well i have a similar story but they rejected mine and basically my son came to me with his drink bottle asking for a drink yes being the lazy biatch of a mum i am i shook it and said whats wrong with this and took a swig just as it passes my throat my son goes ewww mum thats my pee!!!!! UPSIDE apparently urine is good to keep away cancer......

BallsFace 0

Monday 29 August 2011 15:03

What?

aFatFuck 0

Monday 29 August 2011 10:48

God dammit the FML moderators always shut down good discussions! Did you not want to see KaySL rip some new a holes?!? Just when it's getting good they shut it down, can a mod explain to me why, every site will have profanity, I just think seeing the arguments are interesting. Sorry, this was supposed to go on the previous FML but they shut it down :/