OP, the fact that he took the gun from the closet without permission is not making it any better! It is your responsibility as a parent to teach the kid that guns (yes, also paintball markers) are NOT toys!!! Best thing that could happen is that the mail carrier does start legal proceedings against you and your son. Seems you both have a lesson to learn!!! This is a general problem around the Western Hemisphere ... Kids aren't taught respect any more. My son will be born June/July this year. I hope I'll be able to raise him to be a responsible kid with respect for other people. None of which you seem to have accomplished!

Wow, you are HARSH, and not to mention discriminatory against a pretty large population. As I once wrote in a different post, there is no way to know whether or not OP is or isn't a good parent and didn't try to drill it in her kid's head the difference between right and wrong. Point is, parents can honestly try their hardest and do nothing wrong and kids can still be stubborn and might still act out regardless of what they are taught. There is such a thing as suddenly acting out when previously, the parent might not have had any reason to believe his or her kid would do something bad. Granted, what OP's kid was pretty bad, but if he was overall an okay kid before and there was no reason for OP not to trust him, OP to have to keep hovering over him to make sure he'd behave. Obviously, I would hope she'd keep an eye on him now though...

Maybe I shouldn't have generalized. However, when in the past this was basically an exception, it is now the rule that parents let their kids get away with just about anything. Bad grades in school? = WTF teacher? Do you hate my kid? Most kids today know no consequence for their actions or inaction. This is the root cause for the wide spread and escalation of bullying among other things.

I definitely agree about the school thing. I know firsthand how parents (namely my mom's friends) like to blame colleges for not accepting their kids as if the college has some personal vendetta against the kid and that it couldn't POSSIBLY be because the kid was simply not up to the school's standards. (Yeah, not as related to the discipline thing, but still, some parents are crazy defensive when it comes to their kids overall.)

You shouldn't have let them store paintball guns in your front closet in easy reach of a twelve year old. Unless your backyard is a paintball ring, they didn't need to bring them to your home.

i think OP did a great job with disciplineing her son, she made him clean the truck, thus showing remorse for the act and acknowledging it was wrong

Speaking of overdramatic overreactions...

If you read above you know that OP didn't buy him a paintable gun.

Maybe I didn't know that OP had commented because I was skimming? Excuuuuuse me.

Oh definitely, like last week a handful of 12 year olds egged my car. That wasn't destructive at all, and I'm laughing at how long it took to clean off my hood, windshield, and underneath the car bra. Soooo not a big deal.