Animals: Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill... - FML

By Abendigo77 - 14/01/2013 04:49 - United States - Healdsburg

Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 563

You deserved it 6 842

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/12/2014 01:14 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 885

You deserved it 4 405

By itsellie27 - 30/08/2013 14:44 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 936

You deserved it 20 643

Is this dude a puma?

By Anonymous - 04/04/2020 02:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 442

You deserved it 1 522

By blondetergent - 20/06/2011 08:12 - Singapore

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 917

You deserved it 15 346

Ingredients check

By Anonymous - 22/06/2021 18:00

Today, my boyfriend told me the sauce he made for our dinner that was meat-based, trying to show me how nice meat is and stop me being a weirdo vegan. The reason I’m vegan is because my digestive system can’t handle animal protein. I’m writing this from the bathroom, vomiting myself to death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 400

You deserved it 177

By secret meat - 21/06/2014 02:04 - United States - Framingham

Today, after being a vegetarian for 5 years, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 years has secretly been feeding me meat. His reason is that he thinks it's "funny" that I still call myself a vegetarian afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 951

You deserved it 9 853

By Anonymous - 04/02/2010 08:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 791

You deserved it 7 816

Disloyal!

By saywhat - 26/11/2010 03:28 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 278

You deserved it 39 797

Some people just want to watch…

By Z…… - 08/08/2023 06:00

Today, my boyfriend spent half his paycheck on gourmet steaks, bacon, and all sorts of other meat. When I reminded him we were trying to go meatless to help the planet, he said, "Yeah, I'm done with that. The planet can burn." We'd only been vegan three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 2 064

Dumbest Ultimatum Ever

By NeverGonnaHappen - 19/05/2019 12:30

Today, my boyfriend told me I had to get rid of my cats, or he would leave. He punched a hole in my wall when I told him I chose the cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 517

You deserved it 415

Next

Top comments

LegendaryJacob7 7

Monday 14 January 2013 9:10

But humans are animals. No?

BRLHP 24

Monday 14 January 2013 9:09

I wonder what his choice would be if it was his life or the cats.

Comments

calivianya 29

Tuesday 15 January 2013 2:38

Apparently he's forgotten humans are animals, too. You should sing "The Bad Touch" by The Bloodhound Gang to remind him. "You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel!"

dereksmalls1985 7

Tuesday 15 January 2013 3:20

Breakup time.

TurkeySlab 9

Tuesday 15 January 2013 3:33

Why the hell is a guy a vegan?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Wilkouak 3

Tuesday 15 January 2013 4:13

Your vegan friend would make a great steak, so to speak...

haagen3 2

Tuesday 15 January 2013 4:51

Scientifically you are an Animal.

MikeFoxtrot01594 11

Tuesday 15 January 2013 5:02

So he would rather kill an animal that is known to be sentient over one who's level of self-awareness is highly questionable?

Derpylicious 3

Tuesday 15 January 2013 5:46

Your boyfriend is an idiot. Don't waste your time on him.

joetan 16

Tuesday 15 January 2013 8:37

Technically, humans are part of the animal kingdom. So.. FYL for having an idiot as your bf as well!! >.

Gongi80 5

Tuesday 15 January 2013 11:05

U need to break up NOW before u end up being a 6 o'clock news story.

UMadBro_87 3

Tuesday 15 January 2013 11:49

I've a question about veganism. It's my understanding that they avoid animal products because an animal was killed etc etc, but what if the animal died of natural causes, thereby negating the moral implication. I get Jainism etc, where they are vegans because they won't eat something with a soul, fair enough, but what about an animal loving vegan?

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 434

You deserved it 10 095

Today, it was dad’s funeral and I intended to speak but I was crying so much I couldn’t finish and mom had to help me back to my seat. Unfortunately, most of our family are arseholes and I could hear someone saying, “Disgraceful, shaming his dad like that.” It was the worst day of my entire life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 633

You deserved it 81

The Top

Today, my mom wanted to kick me out of the house, but she has a brain tumor and can’t be left alone. I want to leave this place, but I can’t leave her. I’m ready to quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 112

Today, my father taught my son to pee on trees outside. We went to the mall later and my son decided to practice what he'd learned on a potted plant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 929

You deserved it 6 115

Today, to be nice, I baked cookies for my step-mom as a birthday present. I burnt my hand while putting them in the oven, but I'd hoped it would be worth it. When she got home, I gave one for her to try. She took a bite, spit it out, and threw it on the floor, asking if it was a joke or if I was really trying to poison her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 402

You deserved it 3 631

Today, I decided to clean my face of unwanted visitors, and spent my shower popping the pimples on my cheeks. Twenty minutes later, I remembered that I was showering ahead of a date with my girlfriend. My cheeks now look like the crater-filled surface of Mars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 763

You deserved it 12 792

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 864

You deserved it 5 051

Today, my 16-year-old cousin told me she was "late." When I asked if she could be pregnant, she said no, because, "You can't get pregnant the first time you have sex." I ended up having to give her the sex talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 560

You deserved it 227