Miscellaneous: Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly,...

By Thomas - 11/11/2013 17:20 - United States - Portsmouth

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 424

You deserved it 7 600

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Same thing different taste

Chill out

By Bruce - 01/12/2022 18:00

Today, I had to warn my wife not to kill her insane mother. I was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 93

Bruce Willis move

By Anonymous - 18/11/2023 00:00

Today, my wife straight up knocked my mother out cold with a straight jab to the face, turned to walk away, cracked her neck and announced to the world, “I’ve been waiting 4 years to do that.” What the hell has been going on around here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 243

By crapedup - 10/10/2011 23:11 - United States

Today, I mentioned to my wife that we should try marriage counseling. She responded by denying it while throwing a carton of milk at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 051

You deserved it 3 077

By dazedandconfused - 18/09/2016 09:44 - United Kingdom - Dorking

Today, I found out why my wife has been upset with me for the last week. She told me this morning that I did something to upset her on our date night last Friday, she won't tell me what, and she said she'll leave me if I do it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 455

You deserved it 1 102

Promising

By Anonymous - 14/10/2022 10:00

Today, my wife of 12 years told me she would be more peaceful if I just killed myself. I argued that I’m not going to, but she assured me that I would. It’s just ‘when’ that’s in question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 189

You deserved it 118

By Anonymous - 29/08/2015 11:28 - United States - Manhattan Beach

Today, I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. Now she's threatening to kill herself if I don't forgive her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 986

You deserved it 2 119

What goes around…

By Anonymous - 02/08/2020 20:01

Today, my wife demanded that I cut all ties with my best friend, just because she doesn't like the jokes he tells. Now she's bitching that she's upset because his wife, who she works with, is talking about her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 528

You deserved it 344

By single - 01/07/2011 09:12 - China

Today, my wife and I were watching TV. The lady on the show began to talk about how to have a smooth divorce. My wife discreetly turned the volume up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 841

You deserved it 4 515

Spoiled

By RIP - 30/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I finally got my boyfriend to watch one of my favorite TV shows. I was excitedly talking when he interrupted me and angrily said, "Can you stop with the fucking spoilers?" I then realized I'd spoiled half the show. He left to play video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 910

Get over it

By DD. - 08/02/2010 14:18 - France

Today, my wife told me that she wants a divorce. Apparently, I'm taking too long to forgive her for having an affair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 039

You deserved it 4 118

isallwaysme 27

Monday 11 November 2013 22:21

well what else would the movie be about?

DocBastard 38

Monday 11 November 2013 22:24

Just keep watching with her. When the motorcade starts going down the street, just yell, "DUCK, JACK!" After he's shot, she'll be amazed that you accurately predicted the outcome. She'll think you're a genius. It couldn't possibly go wrong.

Comments

stitesy29 18

Tuesday 12 November 2013 2:09

Maybe she just doesnt like the joke Kind of a dark one

creepyclowntown 10

Tuesday 12 November 2013 2:28

maybe test her and talk about how he died by being stabbed.If she gives same feedback you know she failed history class

DarkCobalt55 6

Tuesday 12 November 2013 2:53

Mind: blown

mokka44 8

Tuesday 12 November 2013 4:20

I think she's angry because of your sense of humor. My wife is well aware that he was killed and she would be angry with me for being insensitive.

diaspora_fml 26

Tuesday 12 November 2013 14:47

Your choice of a wife so wholly incompatible with your sense of humor or manner of thought quite obviously exposes a marriage story with no need of a "spoiler alert."

mrpravz 5

Tuesday 12 November 2013 4:22

She threw a book? She might wanna try reading some of those instead. Maybe one on history.

HanBroman 20

Tuesday 12 November 2013 4:29

John tucker doesn't die in "John tucker must die"... and ok I understand that they must be pretty ignorant to not know about jfk's life but even so the name isn't a dead giveaway. I wouldn't have just assumed it but I'm also from Australia and don't really know American history. It could have just been about people's attempts to kill him.