Miscellaneous: Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got... - FML

By Anonymous - 17/01/2012 03:19 - United States

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 435

You deserved it 10 641

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Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - 07/04/2022 18:00

Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 227

By SebastianMiko - 09/11/2012 07:18 - Canada - Calgary

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 104

You deserved it 2 323

By single again - 06/09/2013 00:29 - United States - Chico

Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 122

You deserved it 5 300

By BUSTED. - 01/12/2015 19:02 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 578

You deserved it 3 711

Gotcha

By Pissed - 28/10/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 87

By mystery - 17/06/2012 02:08 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 732

You deserved it 2 392

By Ava_Darkflame - 01/01/2017 15:54 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 514

You deserved it 168

By Alex - 07/10/2010 10:10 - United States

Today, I noticed that my wife changed her status on Facebook to "widow" and a lot of strange guys commented saying stuff like "Finally." Last I checked, I'm not dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 519

You deserved it 3 259

By ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 567

You deserved it 4 614

Up to no good, sonny Jim ?

By Anonymous - 03/08/2022 10:00

Today, I went to the dentist in the same building my wife works. I decided to leave a love note on her car to surprise her. I'm currently being held by security, waiting on the cops, on suspicion of stalking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 156

Next

Top comments

HollowSanctuary 7

Tuesday 17 January 2012 9:05

Cuff her and play out what she said

Complaining 13

Tuesday 17 January 2012 9:04

Perhaps...it's a sign. Maybe...could be.

Comments

mchoate 1

Saturday 21 January 2012 7:57

Maybe she was mad at U and that was her polite way of saying **** you.

loveMe808 1

Sunday 22 January 2012 18:10

Lol.... Most definitely... **** THE POLICE!

jonnypalmerr 0

Sunday 22 January 2012 18:56

good. **** THA POLICE! those niggas are ******* and won't do shit

timebandit3077 8

Monday 23 January 2012 4:54

number 8. go f#@$ yourself. you are the reason police have a job. to put away scuba like yoy. so f#@$ you. not the pilice

cheesiestcake 1

Wednesday 25 January 2012 1:34

Is that u in that ic cuz u r hawt!!! And u got sum big ass boobs

PinkFun1969 9

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:40

You should teach her a leason!!

declanandrewbell 1

Saturday 28 January 2012 18:18

that just means you're gettin some mate

LateandGreat 11

Sunday 29 January 2012 17:52

40 likes? That just means a lot of people are hot for your wife. That's usually how Facebook works :|

jamaicanbunny 0

Monday 30 January 2012 19:04

She might have meant it literally. Either way it's hilarious

iammrbiggles 0

Tuesday 31 January 2012 5:18

So she technically does **** the police:D

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got dressed, did my hair, carefully applied my makeup, sprayed myself with perfume, grabbed my bag and put on my coat. I got to the door, and then realised that I had nowhere to go, nothing to do and none of my friends were answering my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 486

You deserved it 537

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 347

You deserved it 403

The Top

Today, I walked into a room to help a patient get ready for bed. Except she already was in bed, with two other male patients. I work in a retirement home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 906

You deserved it 1 788

Today, my mom made me teach my delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneered at me, and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash your face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later, she still doesn't get what a URL is, and I fear for my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 260

You deserved it 3 047

Today, I warned my husband not to eat the seafood he'd left on the counter. He insisted it was fine. He’s now been in the bathroom shitting, puking and wailing for three hours. Our place is tiny and the bathroom is attached to our bedroom. The door doesn’t keep out the noise or the rancid smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 966

You deserved it 206

Today, while at work at a call center, I got a call from an elderly man who needed a new credit card because he'd accidentally cut up his own card instead of his wife's. Trying to be funny, I said "Trying to keep her in line, eh?" Turns out his wife had just died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 209

You deserved it 21 749

It's National Hotdog Day!

I agree, your life sucks 659

You deserved it 203

Today, my best friend asked if car oil could be used as a substitute for lube. I need new friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 976

You deserved it 1 445