Intimacy: Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had...

By Username - 18/03/2010 08:21 - France

Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 585

You deserved it 49 800

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Same thing different taste

By Who1s269 - 03/05/2013 12:13 - United States

Today, my wife told me that getting in the mood to have sex with me is like trying to get in the mood to hit the treadmill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 251

You deserved it 8 412

Let's get it on

By Frank - 17/08/2011 06:50 - United States

Today, I came home from work tired and horny, and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to go make love. While all she had done all day is lay on the couch and watch television, she said, "I'm too tired, why don't you just go into the bathroom and grab a quick wank." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 057

You deserved it 6 456

Waste of time

By I'mmessedup - 29/09/2021 22:59

Today, after weeks of every excuse not to, my wife wanted sex. It was amazing, and she had at least 3 orgasms. Instead of cuddling afterwards, she got up like someone kicked her and started bitching about all the things she could have been doing, as she got dressed and stormed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 152

You deserved it 538

Access denied

By Anonymous - 26/09/2023 19:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, my wife spent all day texting me dirty things so I used some of my holiday hours to come home 3 hours early for some sexy time. During my drive home she got in a bad mood, and no longer wanted sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 125

Wait

By Anonymous - 20/07/2022 22:00

Today my wife told me she really wanted to have sex, and to wait in bed while she got ready. Turns out get ready means do the dishes, feed the dogs, clean the cat's litter tray, phone her sister, make coffee, shower, and wait for the dryer to dry her pyjamas. By the time she got in bed, I'd fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 467

You deserved it 1 087

Caught in 4K

By ScrewU - 17/08/2022 19:59 - United States

Today, I got off early from work to catch my wife screwing her co-worker in our bed. I ask her what I did to deserve this. She told me she was “lonely” and that he “always makes her feel like a woman,” unlike me. She would come home from work and I would initiate intimacy, but she would decline every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 893

You deserved it 159

In the mood

By Anonymous - 16/10/2019 02:00

Today, I rushed home because my wife called to let me know she was feeling horny for the first time after getting over a bad flu. I walked in the door and surprise surprise, her sister had called round, wanting sympathy after her latest fuckbuddy dumped her. Romantic mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 256

You deserved it 207

The truth

By LOLCATS - 13/10/2009 13:45 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife came home from work early and told me she'd been fired. She was really upset so I told her how much she means to me and how much I love her to help cheer her up. She then told me she was caught getting it on with another employee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 396

You deserved it 2 504

Teaser

By Frustrating - 21/07/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my wife spent the entire evening grabbing my crotch, whispering dirty things to me, and telling me how horny she was, right up until the kids went to bed. Then, it was, "Baby, I just want cuddles, I don't feel like sex" and pouting. This happens at least three times a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 616

You deserved it 130

So frustrating!

By Marvin-jones - 02/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 133

snakeonthesun 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 16:11

that's why she said she was horny! To get you in the mood. was that not enough?

goonie85 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 16:43

"Um, you need to get me in the mood." Isn't that something a woman says? Pull out your tampon and **** that woman stupid.

Comments

rhythmbandit 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 21:13

um no offense sir but I'm pretty sure the image of your wides bleeding ****** should become a turnoff for you. get some help. or a man.

rhythmbandit 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 21:14

wifes*

rockstatic 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 21:25

I'm with OP on this one. Most women just assume that their mere presence should be enough to drive their man wild. It's stupid, and it's insulting to the man that she treats him like a machine. I think OP should politely point this out (without the stupid part) and hope his wife figures things out.

Cinn_fml 22

Thursday 18 March 2010 22:31

I think the reason she left is the way he said it, not that he needed some encouragement.

xxtacos4lifexx 4

Thursday 18 March 2010 22:08

dick move

FruityLoooons 8

Thursday 18 March 2010 22:10

*sigh* You blew it, man.

withasmile 3

Thursday 18 March 2010 22:19

He hasn't gotten any for 2 weeks. it's much more than her just expecting him to be a 'machine.' I understand wanting your wife to come on to you, but clearly nobody's been coming on to anybody.

ClouDn9n 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 22:28

shes prolly sick of you, or is sick of goin down on you. i do thesame to my bf. thats the way its gonna be. u gonna have to change or be more romantic cuz it sounds like u suck