Miscellaneous: Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my... - FML

By Scarred4Life - 01/01/2012 06:18 - United States

Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my drunk, naked uncle pouring olive oil over himself and rubbing it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 766

You deserved it 3 522

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Same thing different taste

By SAM - 05/08/2018 09:00 - United States

Today, my dad gave me his old camera. I got home and eagerly turned it on to start using it. I was greeted by a photo of my father drunk, smiling, naked, and covered in peanut butter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 235

You deserved it 333

By Falling off the wagon - 09/11/2013 13:20 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, my uncle gave me a very expensive bottle of champagne at a celebratory family event. We were celebrating me spending 1 year sober. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 456

You deserved it 3 569

By CK95 - 01/01/2015 23:02 - United States

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 840

You deserved it 8 052

By vanorav - 18/03/2012 02:41 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 577

You deserved it 2 249

By Vlad - 21/11/2018 13:30

Today, my uncle is on vacation with his friend, who sent us a video of their hotel room. He captured a glimpse of my uncle in the shower. Naked. This can't be unseen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 044

You deserved it 300

Family values

By Anonymous - 19/09/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 233

You deserved it 5 383

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 665

You deserved it 2 777

By Anonymous - 26/11/2013 16:43 - United States - Erie

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 071

You deserved it 3 570

By batsu - 27/01/2012 06:48 - Canada

Today, I made a drunken bet with friends that I could pour lighter fluid on my hands, light it, and shake it out before I got burned. I lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 972

You deserved it 66 790

By always-the-responsible-one - 03/01/2010 08:42 - Canada

Today, I just spent half an hour cleaning up my little brother's puke after he got drunk for the first time. All the people who bought him drinks are still out partying and having a good time, while all I can smell is whiskey, Chinese food, and whatever else was in his stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 625

You deserved it 3 111

Next

Top comments

elinhjortskull 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 12:09

He's sexy and he knows it.

GoWithTheFro 10

Sunday 1 January 2012 12:07

Well, at least it's been a memorable year.

Comments

perdix 29

Sunday 1 January 2012 15:50

And 2012 started with a bang as he let you rub the oil on the parts of his hairy back where he can't reach by himself. Auld land syne, I'll say!

Rabidkid 14

Sunday 1 January 2012 16:34

Did you baste him like a chicken?

sincerelyjay 13

Sunday 1 January 2012 16:53

Don't all uncles do this?

sjhill 32

Sunday 1 January 2012 17:01

It's a good moisturiser. There's nothing like trying to bury a memory before the New Year :P

arw31089 2

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:22

Epic

chels1994 11

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:24

I don't think I could bring myself to stare at my drunk naked uncle...

klong91 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:28

Great way to end the year!

hateevryone 14

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:42

why were you staring? why didn't you walk away?

cynicaloptimist 3

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:43

whatever works for u !

Gil2112 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:46

Eesh, bad acne for him..

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The Top

Today, at my sister's engagement party, my cousins thought it would be funny to get my nanna drunk. They regretted it when she told them, and everyone else at the party about her sex life and how she fakes orgasms with my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 294

You deserved it 9 654

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 538

You deserved it 10 056

The Top

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he said the relationship was too tough for him. When I asked for an example, he responded, "Like, I don't have enough time to play World of Warcraft." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 656

You deserved it 7 887

Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 184

You deserved it 5 036

Today, I found out there's nothing like getting dumped and then receiving an inadvertent Snapchat sext from your ex-girlfriend that was intended for her new boyfriend, on what would have been your anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 588

You deserved it 150

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 803

You deserved it 6 905

Today, I realized that for 31 years I have been defending our children to their father. Our oldest is 31. FML

I agree, your life sucks 484

You deserved it 211

Today, I overheard the girl I like tell her friends about me, “I like his personality a lot, it would be so sexy if he was taller. He’s adorable though.” I’m just below average height for a man. I wouldn’t even consider myself super short. I hate being 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 91