Intimacy: Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like....

By notsohappy - 18/02/2009 21:14 - United States

Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 118 918

You deserved it 11 084

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Same thing different taste

Let down

By Anonymous - 14/05/2014 15:54 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, my boyfriend saw my boobs for the first time. His reaction was, "Well that's... disappointing". FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 586

You deserved it 7 387

By Anonymous - 06/08/2011 01:47 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 755

You deserved it 5 994

ADHD brain

By Unknown - 18/10/2011 04:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. He didn't know how to take off my bra and insisted that he'd figure it out on his own. He gave up a couple of seconds later and played video games instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 937

You deserved it 6 402

Smooth talker

By pixie - 17/02/2009 08:10 - United States

Today, I had sex for the first time with a guy. After he passionately made love to me, I turned to him and said, "You smell really good." He turned to me and said, "You don't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 851

You deserved it 13 789

By Anonymous - 27/04/2013 04:11 - United States

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 658

You deserved it 15 428

Poor performance dude

By crybaby - 01/02/2012 08:19 - United States

Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 026

You deserved it 4 225

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 014

You deserved it 4 134

Waste

By Annie - 31/08/2011 03:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 818

You deserved it 5 301

Backhanded

By kiwi - 13/02/2009 19:24 - United Kingdom

Today, as I was getting dressed after having sex with a guy I like, he told me I looked better with my clothes on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 410

You deserved it 5 609

Let down

By anonymous - 21/06/2009 02:00 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 231

You deserved it 17 261

greenfairy_fml 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 23:26

you should have let him take his pants off and then looked at his dick, cracked up, and left.

jessssxo 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 23:08

awh, that sucks. the same thing is probably going to happen to me ><

Comments

ledzep121 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 19:46

I bet he was small.

xxcheeseizlifexx 1

Wednesday 27 May 2009 2:48

you shoulda taken his pants off and said wow thats really dissappointing my 8 year old brother has a bigger penis... i get that a lot fml

emodude44 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 1:12

Tell him that the playboy models all have implants This however... is what they look like without the photoshoping Welcome to the real world amigo

MTBowen11191993 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 21:56

He says that, but I wonder how many times he'll get that chance again... from ANYbody.

Tahiri 2

Saturday 20 June 2009 20:15

My response was an out loud "aww." I came to say something nice, I'm glad the first post did it for me.

yuibo 0

Tuesday 23 June 2009 15:21

That guy is a loser. Find someone better to have sex with

Thedumbblonde 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 7:55

wowww. most of the guys on fml stories are asses seriously. it doesnt matter if your boobs were too big or too small, they should be fine for anyone.

genius_man16 0

Friday 26 June 2009 22:06

4/5? more like 999/1000

commonsensex 0

Friday 24 July 2009 11:43

Um. That would have been when I put my clothes back on, and left. Not had sex with him. But if he had a tiny dick I hope you gave him shit for it. =|

scabpicker89 0

Friday 7 August 2009 14:22

LMAO. they're little they're tittles. if they're big they are titanics. PS: There a pill for that.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 14 098

Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 434

You deserved it 46 510

The Top

Today, my mom tried to give me a pep talk to boost my self confidence. Somehow, it ended up turning into a conversation about how much of a loser I am and how I have no friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 087

You deserved it 2 894

Today, I got out of a psych ward. I lied and said I was better, just so I could leave because it was that awful… but the truth is that I'm worse than when I went in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 235

Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 012

You deserved it 8 075

Today, and once a week for the past three weeks, I had to tell some house guests to stop flushing things like Q-tips and tampons down my apartment's toilet. My preteen siblings? No, my 45-year-old mom and her similarly-aged boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 753

You deserved it 101

Today, I was introducing my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. I meant to say, "Mom, Dad, this is Tom." Instead, I said, "Mom, Dad, this is Mom." My boyfriend is now jokingly reconsidering our relationship, and my parents won't stop making fun of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 166

Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 280

You deserved it 3 259

Same thing different taste

Let down

ADHD brain

Smooth talker

Poor performance dude

Waste

Backhanded

Let down

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