Kids: Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she...

By mom - 26/01/2014 04:29 - United States - Spring

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 936

You deserved it 10 138

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Same thing different taste

Pissed

By pl. - 03/06/2021 21:59

Today, while on a road trip, I stopped at a gas station and told my kids to go to the restroom. My youngest daughter said, "I had to go earlier, but not anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 881

You deserved it 165

By espylone - 17/12/2011 15:42 - France

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 140

You deserved it 6 496

By shitface - 25/01/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 561

You deserved it 3 441

By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 08:03 - United States

Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 859

You deserved it 3 436

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 22:00

Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 182

By jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 093

You deserved it 450

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 936

You deserved it 8 892

Toilet training

By Anonymous - 22/04/2012 17:12 - United States - Houston

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 353

You deserved it 2 781

By Anonymous - 17/04/2017 08:00 - Australia - Moonee Ponds

Today, my 3-year-old missed the toilet. In the time it took me to get paper towel to clean it up, my one-year-old decided it was the perfect puddle to play in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 190

You deserved it 602

By Disgruntled - 16/03/2016 12:01 - United States - East Lansing

Today, my 2-year-old daughter started showing signs of understanding the potty training concept. She announced to my mother-in-law that she needed to go potty, only to be flatly told, "No, you don't." So she crapped herself. Now it's going to take forever to train her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 148

You deserved it 1 299

Rozza17 29

Sunday 26 January 2014 11:08

Well she did listen...in ways

sleepyglowstar 32

Sunday 26 January 2014 11:09

that really sucks. unfortunately small children can be rather literal!

Comments

Meld86 12

Sunday 26 January 2014 19:01

Well you did say home

midgetism 9

Sunday 26 January 2014 19:22

what a smart ass

Curlytwirly22 17

Sunday 26 January 2014 19:22

You can ground her even if she's 3 she needs to disciplined from a young age !!

Zara23 9

Sunday 26 January 2014 20:29

Film it and show it 2 her when she grows up

AxNxNxIxEx12 7

Sunday 26 January 2014 20:29

At least it was in your house. When I was little I pooped on the floor of my mom's boss's house

sanecatlady 13

Sunday 26 January 2014 20:58

Thank god I don't have kids, having to change my cat's litter box is enough.

konstantinos616 17

Sunday 26 January 2014 21:06

ITT poop puns and according down votes.

TooFuckinFunny 3

Sunday 26 January 2014 22:50

The fact that you stood there and watched her shit on the floor.

MrSarary 26

Monday 27 January 2014 0:19

This made literally laugh out loud.

aine500 16

Monday 27 January 2014 1:07

That is kinda adorable

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You deserved it 7 439

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You deserved it 14 245

The Top

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You deserved it 7 226

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I agree, your life sucks 13 333

You deserved it 1 185

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I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 123

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I agree, your life sucks 1 142

You deserved it 83

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I agree, your life sucks 24 144

You deserved it 4 601

Today, after being totally in love with a guy since middle school, I finally had enough self confidence to go and talk to him. Turns out he's boring as fuck. I obsessed over this guy for nearly 4 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 997

You deserved it 37 186

Same thing different taste

Pissed

Shitty situation

Toilet training

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