Doctor

Medical malpractice

By Anonymous - 02/11/2024 02:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I went to the hospital for severe abdominal pain and nausea. I sat in the waiting room for six hours, just to be told, “We don’t know what’s wrong with you. Try taking Gravol and Tylenol and maybe lay off the fatty foods.” I feel like shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 99

Medicare for all, please?

By GladIAmMovingAbroad - 20/10/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I went to urgent care for cloudy vision and eye pain to rule out an infection. They freaked out and pressured me into going to the ER, implying I could lose my vision. Several hours and thousands of dollars later, I just have dry eyes. I hate our healthcare system. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 94

Quack

By Anonymous - 12/09/2024 14:00 - United States - Elmira

Today, while at my doctor's appointment, all my male doctor did was talk about my weight gain. I tried explaining that I eat healthy and work out, and I’m currently 6 months pregnant with my first child, and have always struggled with body image. It makes me want to develop an eating disorder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 104

Are you lost?

By Anonymous - 10/09/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into what I thought was my doctor’s new office building for my appointment. I sat down, only to realize five minutes later that I was sitting in a small conference room where they were holding a staff meeting, and not the waiting room I thought it was. I had to wait for the doctor's receptionist to come get me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 375

What's on the menu?

By Anonymous - 08/07/2024 05:00 - United States - Yucaipa

Today, my doctor wants me to avoid carbohydrates, proteins, and fats. Yes, I am looking for another doctor while I scratch my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 102

Quacks

By Anonymous - 16/06/2024 15:00 - United States - Gilbert

Today, I went to see the doctor to find out if the injury to my foot will ever heal right, because it's swollen to the size of a bowling ball, and I was hoping to start a method of treatment to get it back to what it was like before. When I asked, the doctor said, "It might, might not." So much for that hope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 86

Am I being Punk'd?

By Anonymous - 05/06/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I was told by a doctor that I have a fatal disease, and that I should start making preparations for when I pass away. Then, another doctor showed up, panicking, and said that was meant for someone else with the same first name as me. The mini-heart attack I had at that moment almost killed me anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 90

Medical miracle

By I'm mad because I never would've guessed it - 02/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, after a week of persistent allergy symptoms, I finally went to the doctor. The cause of everything was an ear infection. After getting an ear cleaning, all of my symptoms - including a sore throat and head, and constantly feeling as though I was going to vomit - disappeared. My ears didn't feel weird at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 115

What do I do?

By ouch - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Canada - Charlottetown

Today, I thought maybe I should go to my doctor because my hips crack every time I take a step. But she's also my recently ex-boyfriend's mom, so I have to choose between being in constant pain or having my doctor poke at my hips while asking me why I'm no longer dating her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 038

You deserved it 6 364

Mr Motivator

By Anonymous - 09/03/2024 14:00 - Yemen - Sanaa

Today, I found that my medical school has lost its WFME (World Federation for Medical Education) accreditation and my certificate (that I should be obtaining in two years) will be worthless. To pour salt into the wound, I have finals next week and it's hard to stay motivated after this kind of news. FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 79

Reported

By Anonymous - 05/02/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, police questioned me on behalf of my doctor, who couldn’t believe one person could use so much insulin, so he thinks I’m selling it to bodybuilders. I really do use it all myself, I use about 6 times as much as my sister who is also diabetic, and my diet is normal. I only weigh 10.5 stone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 118

Healthcare crisis

By Whoops - 07/11/2023 08:00

Today, I finally went to an orthopedic doctor to figure out why my sprained ankle hasn’t healed and keeps getting worse. Turns out I have stress fractures and made them way worse by walking around on them for a month, because my regular doctor told me to stop being hysterical over a sprained ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 86

Very professional

By Really? I am? - 18/10/2023 17:02 - United States

Today, like every other month, I accompanied my paternal grandfather to visit his doctor who's as old as he is, and whom I never spoke to ever. As I waited outside, for the first time ever, grandpa had me come in to meet his doctor. The very moment I stepped into his office, he greeted me with a, "He's obese!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 227

We meet again

By Anonymous - 09/10/2023 07:30 - Germany

Today, it’s been 5 months since I can’t walk properly, 3 months that I’ve been waiting for a doctor’s appointment, and 1 day since I found out that the "top specialist" was in fact the same doofus who couldn’t help me with the same issue years ago. He was out of his depth as soon as nothing conclusive showed on the X-ray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 103

Meanwhile…

By Yudith - 30/09/2023 09:30 - Canada

Today, after three months of wait, I expected to have a diagnosis and treatment plan from my doctor. Instead, I got an appointment with a surgeon "just to be sure", and an appointment with a GP to get referrals to two other doctors for more appointments. Meanwhile, my health gets worse and worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 105

What? How?

By Anonymous - 22/09/2023 10:00

Today, I was at the chiropractor's being examined. As we were finding all my problem areas, she said to me, “It’s almost like you spend a lot of time with all your weight on one shoulder while doing a repetitive twisting motion.” She just described mine and my wife’s favourite sex position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 205

Blackstone salivating

By Anonymous - 07/09/2023 14:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I learned that the IBS that several doctors have been misdiagnosing me with for 10 years is actually IBD, which is not only infinitely worse, but it's gotten to the point where surgery might be in my immediate future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 59

Nervous?

By Anonymous - 30/08/2023 08:00 - United Kingdom - Wakefield

Today, I went to my GP to discuss my anxiety. As I was explaining my symptoms, I accidentally farted loudly due to my nervousness. The doctor paused and said, "Well, let's address that as well." FML.

I agree, your life sucks 609

You deserved it 152

Too tired for this shit

By Anonymous - 30/07/2023 00:02

Today, I met a girl at an airport before an early flight, after I’d only had 3 hours sleep. She moved here for a job in radiology. We joked, laughed, flirted, and parted ways. I told my friend, who asked why I hadn't get her number. I joked I would’ve if she'd been a doctor. He then says, “Radiologists ARE doctors, duh!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 1 476

Get on with it

By Anonymous - 04/07/2023 03:00 - Belgium - Eupen

Today, I'm pregnant and feeling awful due to all-day-long morning sickness. My doctor suggested that I cancel all my social plans to be able to keep working. My doctor is also my husband, and the father of this child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 250

TikTok influencers grind my gears

By ThisIsYourDoc - 31/05/2023 22:00

Today, a patient explained to me what treatment he thought I was supposed to give him by showing me a TikTok video. For one, I'm a surgeon, not a dentist, but even if I was, I wouldn't do root canal treatments at 2 a.m. in an emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 777

You deserved it 77

Neverending shift

By ThisIsYourDoc - 15/05/2023 12:00 - Switzerland - Malans

Today, I started a new job as a resident at a rural hospital. So far, nobody has been able to tell me when the shifts were officially supposed to end. They told me they just "leave when we're done with all the patients." I work on a 24/7 emergency station, and I guess I now also live here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 143

Hazmat suit time

By Anonymous - 03/05/2023 13:00 - Kenya - Nairobi

Today, I went to the doctor because I felt sick. He told me to describe the symptoms I had. With every new symptom I described, he took a step back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 131

People will always need plumbers

By ThisIsYourDoc - 15/03/2023 14:00

Today, my hourly wage as a doctor is exactly 80 cents more than the hourly wage of my friend's, who did an apprenticeship with no extra diploma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 264

Sick burn

By Anonymous - 02/03/2023 06:00 - Germany

Today, I got the flu so I needed a sick note. The local doctor’s office has a sign outside saying, “DON’T come in if you’re contagious.” They are also completely unreachable by phone. Sooo, I guess I’ll… send a pigeon? FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 102

Medico issues

By Anonymous - 21/02/2023 10:30 - India - Chennai

Today, a guy on Bumble sent me a dick pic to me. I opened it, stared at it for a good few minutes, and replied, “I don’t see anything unusual. What are your complaints?” And then it hit me: It’s what they call “the life of a medical student.” I’m ruined! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 310

We meet again

By Anonymous - 19/02/2023 06:00 - Germany

Today, I waited months for a specialist doctor’s appointment, only to find out that it's the same guy I already saw for the same problem years ago, who was at his wit's end after seeing nothing wrong on the x-ray, and had no clue as to what might be causing my pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 157

Best foot forward

By Anonymous - 05/02/2023 04:00 - Germany

Today, it’s been 4 months since I haven't been able to walk properly, two months I’ve been waiting for a doctor’s appointment, and one day since I found out that appointment never actually got made by the online booking system. But hey, who needs a left foot? FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 102

Cheers, Doc

By Anonymous - 28/01/2023 00:00

Today, I accidentally swallowed a piece of gum. My doctor says it'll pass in 7-10 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 772

Waiting for a Xmas miracle

By Anonymous - 25/12/2022 12:00 - Australia

Today, I'm in agony. I can't eat or drink anything without being in pain, including water. Doctors don't know what's wrong with me, and can only prescribe me painkillers I can only take 3 times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 142

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 306

You deserved it 6 440

Today, we needed a new TV after our old one died. My husband decided to splurge and ordered a 110 inch TV. It just got delivered and my husband now knows just how big 110 inches is. There is no wall in our house this thing will fit on, and the returns process is crazy complicated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 171

The Top

Today, my hamster went missing. I walked down the stairs into my basement, to find my hamster's head on the stairs, and its body in my cat's mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 342

You deserved it 4 299

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 639

You deserved it 44 422

Today, my boss threatened to write me up, after I made a slightly rude joke about a coworker everyone hates. A while later, a colleague told me the same joke. Turns out my boss had gone around telling it to everyone else and taking all the credit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 446

You deserved it 5 525

Today, I'm going to be the one dropping off two of my friends so they can go hang out. I'm not invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 234

Today, I forgot to bring a letter to my secondary school, so I went to detention. I told them it got lost, but it's only when my parents phoned and told them the same thing that they believed it. So I got detention for nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 228

Today, I’m a short but decently attractive male but I can’t gain enough confidence to approach women, because of the trauma from female classmates treating me terribly in high school when I was still short, but also still going through puberty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 760

You deserved it 215