Animals: Today, while explaining to a group of kids that monkeys are very...

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By Shitty day - 24/05/2016 05:59 - United States - Agoura Hills

Today, while explaining to a group of kids that monkeys are very intelligent creatures, one of them flung poo in my face. FML

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You deserved it 1 571

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 12:49 - India

Today, while studying in India, I was peacefully journaling, reflecting and enjoying the beautiful landscape. And then a monkey threw its poo at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 275

You deserved it 5 402

By LennyComa - 19/03/2017 00:00

Today, I was punched in the balls by a monkey. FML

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By foojew93 - 09/08/2009 17:41 - United States

Today, I was walking at a section of the zoo where you are in the cage, and the monkeys are climbing outside of the cage. I was having a great time until I looked up and one of the monkeys urinated all over my face. Not only did everyone see, but there was no way for me to shower for six hours. FML

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You deserved it 3 836

By mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

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You deserved it 3 237

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 14:05 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I took my daughter on her first visit to the zoo. While we were watching the lemurs, some kid thought it would be funny to start shouting "MONKEY CUNTS" at them at the top of his voice. Now my daughter refuses to stop repeating the same phrase. FML

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By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 617

You deserved it 3 179

By Thanks - 27/11/2009 23:36 - United Kingdom

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo. I threw a piece of my sandwich towards a very cute chimpanzee. As a thank you, he threw a piece of crap at me, which exploded all over my shirt. FML

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By Anonymous - 16/11/2010 19:17 - Israel

Today, was my first day at school. I got kicked out of the class for imitating a monkey. I wasn't imitating a monkey... I was laughing. FML

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You deserved it 5 204

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 02:00

Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML

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You deserved it 148

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 253

You deserved it 3 186

aedar 16

Tuesday 24 May 2016 16:56

I have to ask, was it one of the kids or one of the monkeys?

ssnow_fml 20

Tuesday 24 May 2016 16:56

Hey, sometimes humans fling their poo too.

Comments

Anon E Muss 11

Wednesday 25 May 2016 3:41

Wow, that's a shittty thing to do. Were you monkeying around? After all, monkey see, monkey poo!

Allornone 35

Wednesday 25 May 2016 4:36

so does R Kelly. you have a point.

shutupmichaela 18

Wednesday 25 May 2016 5:34

just because they're intelligent doesn't mean they have to be mature!

katjohn11 6

Wednesday 25 May 2016 6:10

And they have a sense of humor too!!

talon2301 6

Wednesday 25 May 2016 14:25

Kids can be so mean.

soulreaper12296 28

Wednesday 25 May 2016 15:27

A monkey or one of the kids?

marcusling 4

Wednesday 25 May 2016 22:10

Some populations of monkeys can latently carry the monkeypox virus (aka Herpes B virus) which is relatively harmless to simians but has an 80% fatality rate for humans, and you can contact it from getting urine or fecal matter in your eyes or mouth. You should ask the institution you were at for info to see if you need to be checked out.