Health: Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over... - FML

By tash - 24/05/2011 12:33 - Canada

Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over a glass bottle. My legs looked like a disco ball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 973

You deserved it 9 454

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Same thing different taste

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 201

You deserved it 590

Smashing awakening

By charapos - 06/02/2022 12:00

Today, I woke myself up by slamming my ankle into a glass bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 226

Elaine?

By Anonymous - 19/02/2023 23:00

Today, I tried to show off my dance moves at a party and ended up falling through a glass table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 905

By Wounded_irony - 05/12/2017 05:00

Today, I was wearing flip flops whilst putting out the trash, and was careful not to step near the broken glass surrounding the trash cans. My mother ran up to me hysterically warning me about the glass, which startled me and caused me to step on a shard, slicing my foot open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 919

You deserved it 614

Not my day, is it?

By ouch. - 10/12/2018 09:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 733

You deserved it 347

By clair_brodie - 04/07/2019 20:00

Today, as I was putting some dishes away, I spilled water on the floor. While walking around the dishwasher, I slipped on said water, and after going to urgent care, found out I tore my meniscus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 531

You deserved it 223

By couturier - 02/01/2010 07:08 - France

Today, I emptied out a bottle of water onto my porch as I was going into my house. Only a couple of hours later, I decided to leave and slipped on what had turned into ice, bruised my tailbone and sprained my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 955

You deserved it 36 222

By Anthony Hathaway - 19/10/2018 13:30

Today, as I was taking the garbage out, I tripped over my own feet, causing my knee to dislocate in such a way that it shattered the back of my kneecap and fractured my femur. I guess I won't be taking the garbage out again anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 950

You deserved it 211

By ouch - 26/06/2010 14:23 - Canada

Today, my friend hit a glass with her arm, so I dove to try and catch it before it hit the ground and shattered. I hit my head against the table, giving me a nice gash that needed stitches. The glass was actually plastic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 719

You deserved it 8 987

By IHateMyJob - 14/09/2010 02:00 - United States

Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 722

You deserved it 3 397

Next

Top comments

Weetart 8

Tuesday 24 May 2011 18:56

Look on the bright side now you can be the ball of the party.

imacreeper 3

Tuesday 24 May 2011 18:59

when in doubt, dance it out! you've already got the disco ball:)

Comments

geeksaresexy 18

Tuesday 24 May 2011 19:53

We get loads of drunk chav scum throwing bottles into our garden all the time, OP may have had the same thing..

ReynshineCutting 10

Tuesday 24 May 2011 19:53

It may not have been their bottle. We've lived in our house almost a year and are still finding shit like that in our yard from the last tenant. We get bottles in our front yard a lot from people pitching them out their car windows, and we live in a not so good area so it wouldn't surprise me if we had people cut through our backyard at night and drop stuff.

a_traveler 5

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:01

If you're not going to be careful and check the yard, then pants are needed for protection. Just sayin'.

laurad420 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:08

pick that shit up first!

dubsweets 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:09

that sucks. hope there were no kids close by

NextBigThing5044 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:10

Lmao why the **** do you have glass bottles in your lawn ? Fail.

geeksaresexy 18

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:15

Because drunk retards throw them in other peoples gardens..

ipwnlosers 4

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:04

Seriously? SHUT UP WITH THE "FAIL" SAYING.

daminantion 14

Thursday 26 May 2011 8:57

64, seriously, SHUT THE **** UP WITH THE CAPS, YOUR TEXT DOESN'T HAVE VOLUME CONTROL.. fail.

awardZu 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:14

Wear pants, dumbass.

randiZ25 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:14

24, you might be an idiot if...

ECMchase 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:14

PARTY AT OP'S HOUSE

IsBitchBetter 1

Tuesday 24 May 2011 20:15

How was your grass that you couldn't see a bottle? What kind of hobo camp are you living in?

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, thanks to that stupid ass blue dog, our kids haven’t stopped hounding me about when their dad and I are getting married. They’re too young to understand, so I try to gently change the subject. That worked for about 5 minutes before they were right back to asking. Holy uncomfortable subject Batman! FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 727

Today, I told my son to get a job and start paying rent. Five minutes later he transferred me rent for the next 5 years. When I demanded to know where he got that kind of money, he showed me his bank statements. He’s made more money mining Bitcoin than I’ve made in 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 273

You deserved it 1 363

The Top

Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 993

You deserved it 68 588

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 291

You deserved it 5 377

Today, I caught my best friend's wife being a cheating whore, and I told her either she told him the truth or I would. More fool me, she used the time I gave her to convince him I tried to sleep with her, so now he won’t believe a word I say, and he punched me in the jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 213

You deserved it 239

Today, I decided to apply for a credit card to help build up my credit rating. It seemed smart since I'm a 24 year-old college graduate. I was rejected for not having a credit history. Being rejected turns out to hurt your credit history. The irony of my predicament is too great for words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 651

You deserved it 2 901

Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 694

You deserved it 4 939

Today, I have an ear infection. The pain from it radiates from my ear all the way down the left side of my face, so my doctor prescribed me something that makes half of my face numb and pretty much unusable. Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation on strokes for my med class. Go figure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 219

You deserved it 1 918