Health: Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over... - FML

By tash - 24/05/2011 12:33 - Canada

Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over a glass bottle. My legs looked like a disco ball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 977

You deserved it 9 457

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
Discover romantic anecdotes with a touch of awkwardness - because nothing expresses love better than a little discomfort! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 204

You deserved it 593

Smashing awakening

By charapos - 06/02/2022 12:00

Today, I woke myself up by slamming my ankle into a glass bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 634

You deserved it 229

Elaine?

By Anonymous - 19/02/2023 23:00

Today, I tried to show off my dance moves at a party and ended up falling through a glass table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 909

By Wounded_irony - 05/12/2017 05:00

Today, I was wearing flip flops whilst putting out the trash, and was careful not to step near the broken glass surrounding the trash cans. My mother ran up to me hysterically warning me about the glass, which startled me and caused me to step on a shard, slicing my foot open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 919

You deserved it 616

Not my day, is it?

By ouch. - 10/12/2018 09:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 734

You deserved it 349

By clair_brodie - 04/07/2019 20:00

Today, as I was putting some dishes away, I spilled water on the floor. While walking around the dishwasher, I slipped on said water, and after going to urgent care, found out I tore my meniscus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 533

You deserved it 225

By couturier - 02/01/2010 07:08 - France

Today, I emptied out a bottle of water onto my porch as I was going into my house. Only a couple of hours later, I decided to leave and slipped on what had turned into ice, bruised my tailbone and sprained my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 955

You deserved it 36 225

By Anthony Hathaway - 19/10/2018 13:30

Today, as I was taking the garbage out, I tripped over my own feet, causing my knee to dislocate in such a way that it shattered the back of my kneecap and fractured my femur. I guess I won't be taking the garbage out again anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 954

You deserved it 211

By ouch - 26/06/2010 14:23 - Canada

Today, my friend hit a glass with her arm, so I dove to try and catch it before it hit the ground and shattered. I hit my head against the table, giving me a nice gash that needed stitches. The glass was actually plastic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 723

You deserved it 8 988

By IHateMyJob - 14/09/2010 02:00 - United States

Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 724

You deserved it 3 397

Next

Top comments

Weetart 8

Tuesday 24 May 2011 18:56

Look on the bright side now you can be the ball of the party.

imacreeper 3

Tuesday 24 May 2011 18:59

when in doubt, dance it out! you've already got the disco ball:)

Comments

nitemare0 17

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:18

umm, wouldn't tiny shards of glass shred your legs rather then turn it in to a disco ball? maybe you should go to the hospital

Edoe11xx 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:21

Damn that sucks

fmltiligothigh 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:39

Well next time pay attention, i'm sure if you would of been looking. You would have seen the bottle.

swimchica22 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:53

43 & 30 WIN!

emodude44 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:54

Theres a place called downtown... (Anyone who gets what I'm referencing wins, forever.)

alaskasfml 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 22:46

kesha song was the first thing mine went to. even though the wordings wrong.

purplemnm 9

Wednesday 25 May 2011 3:06

...Funkytown?

izzybd 20

Sunday 16 October 2011 18:09

"Where the freaks all come around" ?

alexFYL 11

Tuesday 24 May 2011 21:59

Every time before I mow the lawn, I do a walk through of my yard to make sure there are no sticks, rocks, trash or other surprises that aren't supposed to be there. I can also see things in the grass ahead of me, even if the grass is pretty tall. :/ Not paying attention will kill you, you're lucky it's only your leg this time.

Djzom13 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 22:08

Still trying to figure out how cut up legs look like a disco ball...

CallMeHush 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 22:14

You know what that means, Time to strut! cue music.

ILoveTabz 0

Tuesday 24 May 2011 22:15

heheh party!!! but no... OUCH.

bigbadtim 7

Tuesday 24 May 2011 22:21

Talk about a pain in the glass.

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Keywords

Food Miscellaneous Toxic Family Gross Health Love Valentine's Day Homeowners Home improvement Kids Awkward Drugs Babysitter Music Lonely Crush Wanker Intimacy Relatable Animals Cats Work Coworkers Transportation Airplanes Embarrassing Sleep Mental health Cute

The Top

Today, my date left the restaurant because I didn’t agree with his opinions about the mentally disabled or mixed race couples, etc. Basically, a real scumbag. He also left me the bill, and it turned out he had all the most expensive menu items, including a £120 bottle of wine. It cost over £300 total. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 361

You deserved it 359

Today, I finally got past my anxiety and confessed my feelings to the guy I like and have been intimate with. He responded that he just still wants to be close friends with me and still bang me monogamously, but with no relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 102

You deserved it 533

The Top

Today, it was my birthday and my first present was finding out that my girlfriend of five years has been cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 641

You deserved it 119

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to take him 30 minutes away to meet his friends so he could go fishing, adding that they wouldn't be gone all night. I dropped him off 13 hours ago, and he doesn't have a phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 995

You deserved it 249

Today, at the restaurant where I work, I served a table of 4 middle-age women. Before greeting the table, I was deciding between saying "Can I get you anything to drink?" and "Can I start you off with something?" My actual greeting? "Can I get you ladies off?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 566

You deserved it 19 295

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well… until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said, "Shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 112

You deserved it 4 743

Today, I was so excited to finally try a new recipe that I found online. After hours of prep, I realized I misread the serving size and ended up cooking enough food to feed a small army. I don't have a freezer and I live in the middle of nowhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 609

Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 493

You deserved it 53 048