Transportation: Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted,...

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 04:53 - United States

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 111

You deserved it 2 563

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 897

You deserved it 3 413

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 893

You deserved it 3 722

Perfume Allergy Man strikes again!

By Lor - 09/10/2019 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a woman got on the bus wearing extremely strong perfume and sat in the seat in front of me. The gentleman I was sitting next to began violently sneezing, so much so that he eventually sneeze-vomited all over my lap and backpack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 843

You deserved it 172

By methane overload - 19/01/2013 01:32 - United States

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 218

You deserved it 3 833

By Anonymous - 10/02/2011 23:32 - United States

Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 149

You deserved it 4 797

By marlow - 15/01/2009 02:25 - Canada

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 868

You deserved it 2 718

By ugly - 10/07/2011 06:03 - United States

Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 185

You deserved it 3 515

By WhatsThatSmell - 25/02/2011 13:25 - Australia

Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 842

You deserved it 4 520

Sharing is caring

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 09:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sitting on the bus when a large woman with what seemed like the flu came to sit beside me. After snorting hideously for five minutes, she picked up her scarf, blew her nose into it, and dropped it. It fell on my lap. When I stood up to leave the bus, there were streaks of snot on my new skirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 241

You deserved it 3 091

By Anonymous - 16/09/2018 13:00

Today, I was sitting a full bus when a man seated himself next to me. After a few moments, he looked at me and said, "I can smell your vagina, you must be ovulating." I don't know if he was hitting on me or what but I couldn't race out of there fast enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 782

You deserved it 278

DrAwesome 6

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:04

Doesn't look like the bus will be running out of gas any time soon.

Doortje 29

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:16

And he didn't offer you a sniff? How rude!

Comments

mz_booty 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:06

lol ohh delish!!! maybe he was special!!!

whoisthisgirl 4

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:07

sounds like a good guy

jordanoth 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:10

I don't think it was just a fart..

KaleidoscopePope 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:12

he got the brown eye surprise

hydef14 2

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:15

lmfao!

ClickMyPicture 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:14

How did it smell? eggs?

Doortje 29

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:16

And he didn't offer you a sniff? How rude!

leeshaleigh 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:21

sniff sniff hooray!

Zmeilerr 22

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:21

It's like a shortened version of giving yourself a dutch oven. ;)

babz1591 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:22

He was probably trying to create heat lol ^_^

savfd645 7

Tuesday 7 December 2010 9:22

damn... that is quite nasty!!! FYL

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 508

You deserved it 15 067

Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 297

You deserved it 1 134

The Top

Today, my boss is still refusing to hire any more people because he's convinced I can handle all of the work after the majority of staff quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 899

You deserved it 3 611

Today, after a long night of studying, my roommate and her friends decided it would be fun to throw a mini party in my room at 7am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 664

You deserved it 605

Today, I discovered that I have dandruff, which I've never had before. I googled the possible reasons, some being depression and hormones. Not only have I not had sex for a year, but it's also the reason I have dandruff. And apparently I'm depressed. How sexy is that? FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 810

You deserved it 6 826

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because someone asked him if we were dating and he lied and said no. He said he didn't want to be a liar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 519

You deserved it 2 691

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I had a penis, our relationship would be better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 193

You deserved it 6 997

Today, I asked my boss if he was getting temp workers to cover the three ladies from my office on maternity for at least the next two years. He laughed at my fine joke, then said my office will just have to cope. I’m the only member of that office left. I have to do the work of four people for two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 131

Same thing different taste

Perfume Allergy Man strikes again!

Sharing is caring

Top comments

Comments