Intimacy: Turned on - FML

Turned on

By Anonymous - 31/03/2012 15:10 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 547

You deserved it 11 133

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Same thing different taste

Wandering

By kmyltd - 14/09/2016 06:18 - Australia - Mount Eliza

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 887

You deserved it 3 619

By Anonymous - 18/08/2015 13:26 - United States - Manchester

Spicy

Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 336

You deserved it 4 027

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 066

You deserved it 5 184

Mind games

By LittleRed - 05/03/2012 08:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got more turned on by the idea of sex with my boyfriend than actually doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 095

You deserved it 4 280

Saucy

By donutsex - 05/08/2014 16:48 - United States - Georgetown

Spicy

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said its like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 246

You deserved it 9 072

By Wheresthecreamfilling - 03/11/2016 06:03

Today, my girlfriend and I had sex. Later, she said the highlight of her day was getting a cupcake from the grocery store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 098

You deserved it 1 903

By esb - 13/08/2009 15:23 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 890

You deserved it 8 333

Unexpected arousal

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 22:46 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Spicy

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 841

You deserved it 12 332

By MrAries - 02/03/2016 11:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I'm so sleep-deprived, I got a boner from just thinking about falling asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 765

You deserved it 2 332

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 363

You deserved it 7 467

Next

Top comments

moosemonkey1000 6

Saturday 31 March 2012 19:43

Those holes are pretty hot.

my_usagi 0

Saturday 31 March 2012 19:44

Cream filled? Lol

Comments

alexup24 13

Saturday 31 March 2012 19:58

mmm... cream filled

winterlies 8

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:02

Just can't help but think "Vash the Stampede... is that you?"

carlychaosxoxo 3

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:03

Donuts are yummy

groupleader 7

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:03

Mmmmm if you are a guy...glazed..if you are not....long john...

Pinkfl0yd 9

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:05

I'll fritter your apples

perdix 29

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:08

That's crazy! How can you get sexually aroused thinking of something with a hole in it that is warm, sticky, greasy and sweet? Hold that thought, I need a moment ...

alexicanaaa 7

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:09

dafuq did I just read?

micahsmommy 13

Saturday 31 March 2012 21:08

An FML. You'll find a lot of them on this website/app.

alexicanaaa 7

Sunday 1 April 2012 0:13

Haha, I know that. I meant what the crap did I just read because it was so stupid. It's just something silly I got off a website and figured it kinda fit this FML. Silly :p

KiwiKitten 2

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:11

Hey, doughnuts are amazing. But didn't think they'd make you sexually excited :P

QQMorePlox 18

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:11

Who needs women when you have a donut with a hole?

shinshoku13 19

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:39

Donuts cant lick ur penis or talk dirty or be romantic... Plus they get soggy... Women dont :3

XtraEzeee 8

Saturday 31 March 2012 21:04

I beg to differ.

Cynical_in_SK 6

Saturday 31 March 2012 22:40

They also don't nag, complain or argue...in fact they don't talk at all! The best thing though is that when you're done with a donut you can lick your fingers and get another. You can even have more than one at the same time if you want. Heh heh. ;)

MrGroovy28 7

Monday 2 April 2012 6:50

I think you are a little too young to talk about "licking penis". Also your choice of phrase is a tad bit awkward.

shahroni1 3

Saturday 31 March 2012 20:12

pevert

Cynical_in_SK 6

Sunday 1 April 2012 2:35

Prude!

WellThatWasRude 27

Wednesday 10 June 2015 15:13

At least spell it right, 40. *Pervert

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Awkward Embarrassing Health Love Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Work Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Gamers

The Top

Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

Today, my wife and I can’t decide if we should force my stepson to wait when he rudely demands something, in the hope he’ll learn patience and some manners, or just give him what he wants so he’ll go away and stop making us miserable. He’s 13. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 1 293

The Top

Today, I had gone to the store and bought a new wallet. 5 minutes later a security guard asks for my receipt. Turns out I had dropped my receipt. Some guy had picked it up and pretended I had stole his wallet. The guard confiscated my wallet because the guy had "his" receipt to prove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103 737

You deserved it 8 421

Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 795

You deserved it 3 392

Today, my dad told me that people requiring psychiatric treatment are just weak and pathetic, and what they really need is a kick up the ass and to get a fucking grip. He told me this not 30 seconds after my doctor recommended I spend some time in a facility for my severe depression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 152

Today, while waiting in line with my 4-year-old son, I had to awkwardly apologize to an African-American gentleman and explain to my son that the man was not made out of chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 750

You deserved it 2 630

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 794

You deserved it 12 485

Today, I was working at a place where if you're tipped, you sing. After a lady paid for her ice cream, she pulled out 5 dollars. Thinking it was a tip, I took it, and sang the song. She didn't mean to tip me. I was stopped by the woman slapping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 863

You deserved it 15 205