Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Turned on - FML

Turned on

By Nicki - 21/12/2011 12:30 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I said something grammatically wrong during it. He chose to correct it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 595

You deserved it 31 884

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

Lost in the sauce

By klsdhjla - 15/02/2010 01:23 - United States

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 337

You deserved it 5 625

By Ally - 27/09/2015 01:47 - Canada - Etobicoke

Today, I wrote a song for my boyfriend on paper. The first thing he did was correct my grammar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 021

You deserved it 8 475

Excuuuuuuse me?

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 13:32 - Canada - Toronto

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 468

You deserved it 11 502

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 305

You deserved it 2 763

Bad sign

By ITalkGood - 28/12/2009 00:37 - France

Today, I finally told my girlfriend I love her. She corrected my grammar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 786

You deserved it 10 024

By Anonymous - 04/09/2011 05:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge fight. What was it over? He accused me of pronouncing MY name wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 733

You deserved it 3 876

By Anonymous - 28/05/2017 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were finally alone and things were starting to get intimate. I was on top of him trying to be sexy, when in my excitement I giggled and called him a "silly girl" by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 866

You deserved it 1 788

It's pronounced Renesmée

By Anonymous - 05/03/2024 16:00 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I told my boyfriend in a joking manner that he says my name slightly incorrectly. Now he’s mad I didn’t tell him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162

You deserved it 472

Side dick

By Joanna - 27/12/2018 18:00

Spicy

Today, during sex I said my side dick's name instead of my boyfriend. He isn't speaking to me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 12 906

What is it?

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 22:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 178

You deserved it 8 219

Next

Top comments

flockz 19

Wednesday 21 December 2011 16:13

OP- "YES YES **** ME GOODER!!" BF- "get the **** off me."

Cheerieful_fml 2

Wednesday 21 December 2011 16:04

Intelligence is sexy.

Comments

Sniperkid07 6

Wednesday 21 December 2011 23:56

Grammatically incorrect.

ffishsticks 2

Thursday 22 December 2011 1:37

Sexual education!

bsbuddy 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 0:38

Don't worry OP, he was really "into" you no matter what, right?

sonnyyx 6

Thursday 22 December 2011 1:44

He's a keeper.

rootlessprophecy 11

Thursday 22 December 2011 2:26

Omg this reminds me of me and my boyfriend. We were sexting and he spelled whisper wrong, so I corrected it and then he said he wasn't in the mood anymore |D''' This FML fits me perfectly.

christa953 12

Thursday 22 December 2011 2:50

Good grammar is sexy.

MoreCowbellFML 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 4:48

Well Was it fun while it last

destermin5 5

Thursday 22 December 2011 5:30

You know your in IB when...

Complaining 13

Thursday 22 December 2011 7:10

Sounds like me.

BloodMonger13 9

Thursday 22 December 2011 7:14

win

maddyyghee 6

Thursday 22 December 2011 7:18

Girlfriend: no ur mum can do dat bit

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The Top

Today, I spotted one of my friends using the ATM outside our school's university center. I crept up behind him, grabbed his shoulders abruptly, and shouted in my best deep man-voice, "Give me all your money!" Turned out to be a poor, unsuspecting freshman. He gave me his money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 915

You deserved it 74 266

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 598

You deserved it 8 701

The Top

Today, after entering a conservatory of music, I've worked really hard on my academic subjects to past through the exam, so my major is pretty weak. After practising 6 hours a day for three weeks, my teacher asked me to change my major and said I'm the worst student she's ever seen. And there‘s nowhere I can go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 178

Today, I was doing takeout orders at the restaurant I work at. I spent a long while putting together this guy's $135.00 order. When he finally got there to pick it up, I told him to fill out the credit card slip. I looked at it after he left. He gave me a 40 cent tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 157

You deserved it 4 563

Today, after our in-laws begged us to go, we drove 350 km each way to attend a birthday party on a Sunday. Upon arriving, they informed us the party started at 5 pm, not lunch time, leaving us to drive 5 hours in the dark. Our reward? My husband, 3 year old, 7 month old, and myself tested positive for Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 106

You deserved it 206

Today, I started my 17th birthday by having to clean my son’s extremely poopy diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 2 127

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train looked like he was about to be sick. I quickly handed him the nearest bag I could find, a bag full of my lunch for that day. Safe to say he held nothing back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 568

You deserved it 3 552

Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 264

You deserved it 2 745