Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: What's wrong with me?

What's wrong with me?

By Anonymous - 06/10/2010 08:30 - Netherlands

Today, I had sex with my new boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he said, "I know women who would be really self-conscious about nipples like that. I love that you accept yourself." I had no clue there was anything odd about my nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 852

You deserved it 3 779

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By leahrb - 24/02/2016 18:55 - United States - Wilmington

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 346

You deserved it 1 890

By ArsonistsLullaby - 21/09/2016 21:02 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. When he slid his penis in, he felt my NuvaRing, and with the most excitement I've ever seen a man muster, said, "Oh my god! You have your clit pierced! I can't believe I actually get to have sex with a girl who has her clit pierced!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 863

You deserved it 1 758

Let down

By Anonymous - 14/05/2014 15:54 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, my boyfriend saw my boobs for the first time. His reaction was, "Well that's... disappointing". FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 587

You deserved it 7 388

By whatswrongwithit?:( - 30/09/2012 19:37 - United States - Chicago

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 475

You deserved it 3 671

By ohman - 28/12/2012 03:06 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, after having sex for the first time with my girlfriend, I realised I was in love with her. I noticed she had an eyelash on her breast. After tugging it a few times I realised it was actually a single black nipple hair. She was so embarrassed, she kicked me out and now won't return my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 411

You deserved it 27 409

Beginner

By madzlovesgee - 16/05/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 877

You deserved it 53 386

By notsohappy - 18/02/2009 21:14 - United States

Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 118 919

You deserved it 11 084

Ow ow ow

By too much pain - 28/06/2023 10:00

Today, a few days after getting my nipples repierced, my man initiated sex. Normally, I love it when he's a little rough on my tits, and I guess he forgot about my not-entirely-healed nips. Let's just say sex ended REAL fast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 735

You deserved it 464

By Anonymous - 27/04/2013 04:11 - United States

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 660

You deserved it 15 429

By Snufflopagus - 01/01/2014 13:26 - United States - Lynnwood

Today, my boyfriend told me that sometimes my nipples taste like onions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 512

You deserved it 10 599

mona_is_here 10

Wednesday 6 October 2010 16:15

He better open his mouth only during oral.

hairt 4

Wednesday 6 October 2010 16:17

tell him his penis was starting to look funny. like a swollen banana

Comments

cyfclife 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 17:53

ydi for having boobs

Johnny6speed2 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 17:53

He's means you've got sausge nipples.

nerdsgetmehot 22

Wednesday 6 October 2010 18:14

Aww. I'm sorry, OP! Hopefully he didn't mean to be offensive. I wouldn't worry too much about what your nipples look like.

mrahhhhh 21

Wednesday 6 October 2010 18:24

He probably just thought your nipples had swelling on them and had grown a round bump under each of them. That's why he thought they were weird :/

SaintE_fml 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 18:31

did you type this FML with them, if so great job if not boooooo

mrFTW 3

Wednesday 6 October 2010 18:36

I thought the same thing!

carpediemryders 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 19:14

tell him you appreciate the fact that he wasn't self conches about his saggy shriveled up balls that look like raisins. lol

Cecee_fml 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 20:10

what does YDI and OP mean?

tessybearbear 4

Wednesday 6 October 2010 21:47

ydi - you deserved it op - original poster, I believe.

starlightLA 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 21:03

This is called insecurity 101! He made a comment about your nipples immediately after sex because he was feeling inadequate about himself for whatever reason. By putting you down immediately puts him in the driver seat and your left second guessing yourself and your nipples. It also takes any attention off of his inadequacies. TRUST ME! this is just the beginning.... he just set the tone!