Cars, Sextoys and Transportation: What what?

What what?

By Anonymous - 25/10/2011 05:58 - United States

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 813

You deserved it 3 515

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Same thing different taste

By Char - 24/09/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom - Gravesend

Today, whilst at work, I had a woman come in with a problem with the seat in her car not moving backwards or forwards. There was a dildo stuck in the chair rail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 848

You deserved it 279

By Anonymous - 12/02/2012 04:25 - United States

Today, after parking my car, I was informed by an incredibly hot girl that my tail light was faulty. I tried hitting it to make it work again. Guess who has 5 stitches and a smashed tail light? FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 779

You deserved it 36 080

By someone - 09/12/2013 12:59 - United States - Mogadore

Today, my car broke down. I pulled to the side of the road to call a tow truck. After waiting what seemed like hours, the tow truck showed up, and then ran into the back of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 152

You deserved it 2 864

By ummWhat? - 23/12/2018 02:00

Today my car was broken into. The only thing taken were condoms and lighters I had in the glove box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 169

You deserved it 202

By ocroyalty - 01/02/2010 07:31 - United States

Today, I was trying to get my car out of my boyfriend's apartment garage but couldn't. Why? Because somebody decided to park in front if the garage door and have sex. Complete with steamed windows and loud noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 535

You deserved it 2 669

By Anonymous - 12/08/2019 04:01

Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 132

By jjuuuuuuulless - 17/12/2018 17:30

Today, my car's parking gear and parking brake failed. I watched as it rolled down a big hill into someone's 2017, $30,000 camper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 296

You deserved it 316

By carless - 15/08/2010 02:25 - United States

Today, my car was stolen. From my driveway. By the guy who sold it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 911

You deserved it 4 232

By nozVail - 20/11/2015 23:52 - United States

Today, I drove to my cousin's house so he could help me fix my broken tail light. On the way there, I got pulled over for having a broken tail light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 395

You deserved it 3 743

By Anonymous - 07/05/2016 01:40 - United States - Walnut

Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 288

You deserved it 2 451

saIty 17

Tuesday 25 October 2011 12:01

Or maybe your car is a Transformer and was playing with itself.

WallyTheWombat 0

Tuesday 25 October 2011 12:04

Lol someone put a ***** in your "tailpipe".

Comments

maggotfoREVer 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 0:59

I was going to say that

JayAyyEmm 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 1:58

It was a virgin.

HappyPickles 11

Wednesday 26 October 2011 2:17

Someone else almost said this already: Sounds like your car had a boot-ie call

mgladin 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 2:51

Fake that is impossible sticking something in your vehicle tailpipe doesn't really cause any issues, pure myth!

awkwardaredevil 5

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:03

That's where I left it!

ilovemetalcore 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:15

Never heard of that one before:p

1emma1997 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:52

That is hilarious! I even said so to myself as I was reading this

ryryman 5

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:57

Hahaha that's the funniest shit I have ever herd,

leadman1989 15

Wednesday 26 October 2011 5:10

Your car got raped! >:0

ernie7861 1

Wednesday 26 October 2011 5:28

That seems kinda difficult. You must either have a very small exhaust pipe or it was a HUGE *****.

Keywords

Love Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Holidays Lonely Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism You're fired Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 886

You deserved it 61 114

Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 145

You deserved it 7 104

The Top

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 059

You deserved it 36 592

Today, I was stuck in heavy traffic. Bored, I looked to my left and noticed someone who seemed to be asleep at the wheel. After staring for a bit, wondering how people can be so negligent, I ended up hitting the car in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 438

You deserved it 48 832

Today, I found out I was dead. Yes, you read it right! Apparently, the pickpocket who stole my wallet two days ago was murdered and since his face was quite unrecognizable, they "identified" him with my ID from my wallet. My mom, who heard this on the news, got hysterical and started trashing my room in "grief." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 88

Today, I got a lot of tips at work, but little did I know our boss takes it out of our paychecks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 973

You deserved it 131

Today, after a 16-hour day fixing the computer network at my workplace, I didn't even get a "Thank you". I did, however, get people whining about how, "That computer crap never works" and, "Why do we need IT anyway?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 84

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100 963

You deserved it 7 658

What what?

Same thing different taste

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