Work: Wobble wobble

Wobble wobble

By Dr.Octopus454 - 07/10/2011 14:58 - United Kingdom

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 146

You deserved it 3 628

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/03/2010 19:32 - United States

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 973

You deserved it 4 045

By Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 742

You deserved it 23 093

Dude, seriously?

By nuberific - 05/03/2009 18:45 - Canada

Today, I was in the changing room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 359

You deserved it 3 497

By ouch - 29/02/2012 19:18 - Italy

Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 132

You deserved it 2 862

By Higgs - 02/06/2009 19:10 - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 150

You deserved it 6 231

By klutz - 10/08/2009 14:34 - United States

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 855

You deserved it 56 841

By Anonymous - 18/06/2015 16:56 - Netherlands - Gennep

Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 990

You deserved it 2 348

By heyyoitsapotato - 31/05/2013 02:35 - United States

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 136

You deserved it 3 300

By spaghett - 29/08/2016 20:32 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 163

You deserved it 1 821

By Anonymous - 11/08/2009 08:58 - United States

Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards. He said that he would gladly give me CPR, in the event that I needed it. I laughed and thanked him, stating that it was a sweet idea, even though I wouldn't be needing assistance. I then choked on my bottled water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 938

You deserved it 44 869

ollie179 21

Friday 7 October 2011 18:41

Why were you watching his penis wobble then? Look at his face.

that1guy1 13

Friday 7 October 2011 18:38

Nothing wrong with a healthy conversation regardless of clothing.

Comments

cptmorgan6 8

Friday 7 October 2011 18:51

Then you should be used to it. Also, why is it that you waited until this time to post it here?

mritty 2

Friday 7 October 2011 18:53

Oh please. If you don't want to see a naked man, don't walk into a men's locker room. Period. There is nothing strange or abnormal about a guy being naked in a locker room.

ILoveTabz 0

Friday 7 October 2011 19:03

Why were you staring at his junk to begin with?

Wheredidgrungego 12

Friday 7 October 2011 19:06

Hangin' loose? Yup.

ScarletBloom 14

Friday 7 October 2011 19:15

Yours don't wobble?

walrusman 0

Saturday 8 October 2011 0:42

You sir are a genius!

Llama_Face89 33

Friday 7 October 2011 19:18

I feel your pain, man... This happened to me ALL the time when I was lifeguarding at the YMCA. The worst part is you become used to it...and it actually ceases to phase you... >_

Brandonbhp 6

Friday 7 October 2011 19:25

His eyes are up there ^

Cheylea 10

Friday 7 October 2011 19:36

Awesome job, they hiring?

perdix 29

Friday 7 October 2011 19:38

What happens all the time? Conversations about pool chemicals making penises wobble? And why are you watching his penis anyways? When I have to talk to a naked man, I focus over the top of his skull, so the lower boundary of my peripheral vision barely contains his face. Looking any lower is, well, you know ...