By not a dick-man - 12/08/2014 17:05 - Canada - Victoria

Spicy
Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 732
You deserved it 31 570
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Comments

Kyle1dc 17

You've got balls to do such a dick move like that to your friend.

93 5
baseballbv 17

I can't help but wonder why OP had to ask. I'm sure he could've guessed by the general location the bulge was in...

97 4
1two3four5six 23

Besides, it's not like it's any of OP's business what's in someone's pockets. I would have just assumed it was either their junk or their phone.

89 3
JBChristian 47

I think with Mike's username, whatever was in the friends pocket really wasn't a dick.

5 49
Kyle1dc 17

#54 Probably a brainfart of dickish proportions.

3 20
StiffPvtParts 43

Correction: He probably now thinks Mike (OP) is gay c: (Just to be clear, there's nothing wrong with being gay)

11 3
MrConcise 34

Gotta rock out with your **** out. What are you, a Mike?

207 0
pussystank 18

Or maybe he has a large one or was wearing really tight pants.

21 2
Fr0gs 15

Reminds me of the utube video with the police officer patting down the black guy haha

tatertotx3 16

If you're going to spell something, spell it the way you see it. * YouTube.

34 4
pussystank 18

That's no longer a stereotype. They do have big ones lol.

0 16
xXDemonWolfXx 13

Biggest one in the world is a white dude. And that is natural without taking something to make it bigger.

4 7
ex_omer 17

Thank the gods u didn't jerk it or pull it out

331 8
cinskeep43 15

also good that he didn't hit it or smack it... there could've been trouble..

34 1
KittyLahv 27

Also good he didn't bop it or twist it.

64 1
newnightsky 5

or bite it and fist it no?... ok

14 0
Pleonasm 35

A ballsy move on your part, but your coworker was a little testy.

337 12
OysterPearls 33

It was just a simple mistake, no need for his friend to be a dick about it.

6 57
Kyle1dc 17

Insert penis joke... oh wait a moment...

86 3
ryan1268 18

I would post a penis joke but it is too long ;)

32 7
fauxpop 3

I can't stop laughing.... You sir are clever xD

1 1
ImTheAlpha 30

Why would you poke anything f you didn't know exactly what it was? I mean, you can point out what it is by, well, pointing, but don't poke it.

211 7
Animekid126 13

Because sometimes people touch things, he's not thinking of all these precautions throughout the day

29 7
PegLegRacing 34

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
7 72
princesspeachxox 18

@50 can you say pun, read the comment again

18 3
inner_peace 19

That pun flew right over his head

15 3
PegLegRacing 34

My phone actually autocorrected that... It was supposed to be ridickulous. I got the pun. It was the "re" part I was correcting.

4 6
magnetic_aura 26

That doesn't make sense for your post...

0 0
UmmOkThen 31

Ohhhh, so awkward. Insert foot in mouth.

59 6
Earths_Venus 25

I'd like some tomato sauce with that foot please.

18 1
cinskeep43 15

let's hope the only thing inserted into a mouth here was a foot....

25 1
RedPillSucks 31

I don't think it's a foot the guy's thinking of inserting.

1 10
RusticChick 27

I'd say that's one awkward moment you'd look back on and laugh about.. or bury very deep and never bring up again. Either way, I got a good laugh from this!

74 2