By Anonymous - 27/09/2015 07:10 - United States - Queens Village

Today, while singing Happy Birthday to my husband, I desperately needed to fart. I couldn't leave the room, so I let it out real slow. There were over 20 of us there, yet somehow my mother-in-law knew it was me. She went over to the window and opened it wide, all while glaring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 140
You deserved it 4 062
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

skippydoda 32

I have a feeling even if you didn't do it, she'd still blame you.

237 2
colinabi 13

Something tells me she doesn't like you very much .

231 2

Comments

rashpimplezitz 9

I'm pretty sure if he were new here, he wouldn't have posted that comment

32 2
JustinJK 21

That really stinks that you don't want any flautence jokes. They're a work o fart.

51 2
colinabi 13

Something tells me she doesn't like you very much .

231 2
skippydoda 32

I have a feeling even if you didn't do it, she'd still blame you.

237 2
Grayness_ 26

Maybe she saw when you flexed your stomach to fart? Or she has smelled your farts.

8 24
JayVicious 20

The 1st seems possible because everybody gives a tell when they do this....but people don't have thier own brand of fart that smelks unique to them, but goes by what you eat.

2 19
kieralumina 30

If you've lived with someone long enough you can tell if it's them that coughed, sneezed, farted (by sound/smell), used the bathroom, etc. Probably not among 20 people unless the person has a very specific diet though.

21 1
deathshead 19

cant tell someone by fart? you obviously havent met my family

12 1
KaidensCrow 18

Lol my husbands farts always smell like something crawled up his ass and died... Lol so yeah I could actually tell him by his farts

13 2
xx000o 27

Farts are genetically coded, just like fingerprints.

10 1
teentee401 36

She probably didn't know it was you, but decided to blame you because she is your mother-in-law. Don't stress about it.

38 2
pjsr 32

Then again, some people have their own unique 'signature smell'. OP may be one of them.

4 1
Old_Liver 5

She is also probably one to spread rumours and pin every fault on you... was it loud and proud or silent but violent?

11 5
JayVicious 20

by the wording...out of your options i would say silent and violent since she was trying to hide it and was blamed.

10 1
JustinJK 21

Women*; Troll comment is trollish. gr8 b8 m8

11 3
KaidensCrow 18

everyone farts it's a natural body function

2 6
Luxray24 13

That is beyond ignorant. That is like saying guys dont gossip.

3 7
cocainewhore 30

#38 I didn't read this as 'women don't fart', I think he was trying to say more along the lines of 'ydi, woman, don't fart.' I mean, it's still a pretty pointless comment but makes more sense than saying women don't fart.

9 2
enginsteve 17

and #38 points out the impact of proper punctuation! also, sweet screen name! Lol

1 3