Dude, WTF?
By truckstopworker - 27/04/2017 02:00
By truckstopworker - 27/04/2017 02:00
By Anonymous - 27/04/2017 00:00 - Netherlands - Utrecht
By Tom - 26/04/2017 18:00
By ldemosthenous - 26/04/2017 15:03
By Alittlebitiffy - 26/04/2017 14:00
By "senordonkeydildo" - 26/04/2017 05:00 - United States - Center Conway
By HarleyGirl - 25/04/2017 18:00 - United States - Sterling Heights
By Talented73 - 25/04/2017 20:00
By feeling fed up - 25/04/2017 17:00 - United Kingdom - Dundee
By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00
By somanybirds - 25/04/2017 08:00 - United States - Jacksonville
By IamTheSalt - 25/04/2017 02:00
By SaltIsReal - 25/04/2017 00:00
By Anonymous - 24/04/2017 22:00
By MrsMusselLady - 24/04/2017 17:26 - United Kingdom - Huntingdon
Lol no, it was my first weekend off after working 8 days in a row! I had gotten off work at 0700 and went straight home to that whole situation.
By katinka - 24/04/2017 18:11
Hey guys! OP here. First of all: yay, one of my submissions finally made it! So, to clear some things up: 1. The fml is obviously about me being embarrassed to death that this happened. I wanted to make a good first impression and I was so nervous and I forgot to put the cup away. It's defiantly not about me thinking she made an unreasonable request or anything. 2. The cup was emptied and thoroughly cleaned. I had left it on the edge of the sink to dry off before putting it away and I accidentally forgot about it. She saw that and was fine with touching it, so it wasn't really something disgusting, just a very, very unfortunate thing to happen on our very first day of living together. 3. This happened a while ago, and neither I or my roomie think it's a big deal. We're both fine with, you know, women occasionally not covering up all evidence of having their period once in a while. It was just incredibly embarrassing and awkward when it happened, but now we're all good! :) Cheers!
By Hobbits&LiarsOhMy! - 24/04/2017 11:06 - United States - Nacogdoches
I'm the OP. So, let's be clear: I'm "5'6" and height isn't a big deal for me. What was important to me was that he lied. He also showed up to our meeting stoned off his ass, and then proceeded to throw a muddy basketball at me (which got all over my new shirt). Definitely not Prince Charming. I got out of there ASAP! I guess online dating just isn't my cup of tea. Thanks for the FML though! :)
By BrokenHangLow - 24/04/2017 12:00 - United States - Havelock
By Languages - 24/04/2017 09:58 - United States - Irving
OP here. What a surprise, my first published FML! Being a Mexican restaurant, all of the employees there were Mexican. I try to keep up on my Spanish and wanted to know the translation. This one turned out to be rather easy to remember. Cheers!
By You'veHadTwoWeeksToTellMe - 24/04/2017 12:00 - Australia - Melbourne
By FlamedOut - 23/04/2017 22:00
By college student - 23/04/2017 10:00 - United States - College Park
By Anonymous - 23/04/2017 14:00
By James - 23/04/2017 02:00
By Anonymous - 22/04/2017 23:00 - United Kingdom
By Stop being healthy - 22/04/2017 22:00
By Newly Minted Canuck - 22/04/2017 20:00
By I hear everything... - 22/04/2017 18:00
By SimpleSadie - 22/04/2017 16:00
By RB84 - 22/04/2017 02:00
Keywords
Wow! I can't believe this got posted so fast. I only posted it like 3 days ago. Let me just inform you all that I made it out, SAFE and with UNBROKEN doors. I texted a buddy of mine and he came and got me out, but not before making me listen to him tell me a plethora of gay jokes. It was worth it though because after I came out of the closet (ha ha) we had some beers and played video games for a few hours. And to answer some peoples' concerns, my girlfriend and I prank each other a lot. She pranks me more often than I prank her. Or she tries. I go for stelth and try to wait and do something when she thinks I've forgotten about or war or when least expects it. Obviously I peaked myself this time, but just wait. :)