Weird, Delivery and Love: Army dudes

Army dudes

By Anonymous - 02/12/2014 17:39 - United States - Glendale

Today, I received a package from my deployed husband. It contained a scarf, a letter, and a bag full of his pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 346

You deserved it 4 216

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/07/2009 06:31 - United States

Today, I opened some small cute birthday gifts at my boyfriend's house. As we left to go out, he slipped me a Tiffany box and said he wanted me to open it in private. Flushed and excited, I open it to find a ziploc filled with hair. It was his mustache I had been begging him to shave for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 803

You deserved it 20 454

By marisa - 05/01/2013 00:31 - Ireland - Carlow

Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 242

You deserved it 4 316

By btchzloveit - 29/09/2011 12:27 - United States

Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 265

You deserved it 2 414

Good one, thanks

By zackeryburch - 03/08/2013 13:01 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 488

You deserved it 6 551

By marriedtoatool - 26/12/2012 06:15 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I received from my husband for Christmas the body lotion that only he uses. And nothing else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 702

You deserved it 2 947

By Anonymous - 11/06/2009 13:24 - Australia

Today, I was about to go and take a shower when I saw a pair of scissors taped to the door at eye level with a note from my boyfriend saying "Time to trim that hairy thang down under." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 533

You deserved it 55 963

By same - 21/11/2015 06:39 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 800

You deserved it 6 878

By steakysteak - 12/03/2010 15:06 - United States

Today, I got a package in the mail from my girlfriend. I was really excited until I realized that it was just a box full things that I gave to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 202

You deserved it 2 491

By CJ - 12/08/2016 01:02 - Canada - Lethbridge

Today, I was looking for a moustache comb, couldn't find it anywhere. Then I noticed it in a basket by the toilet with scissors. My wife's been using it to trim her pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 177

You deserved it 2 314

By ChopSuey - 01/06/2016 04:02 - United States - West Monroe

Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 912

You deserved it 1 626

Welshite 39

Wednesday 3 December 2014 0:10

Now you need to put his pubes in a locket so you can wear them around your neck and remember him forever. It's the ultimate romantic gesture.

kimg0885 23

Wednesday 3 December 2014 0:13

Make a scarf out of the pubes and send it back to him for Christmas!

Comments

godspeedkills 8

Wednesday 3 December 2014 1:43

Thanks OP now I know what to get my gf for Xmas!

patrickeli 15

Wednesday 3 December 2014 2:26

... Ew?

vikky538 28

Wednesday 3 December 2014 2:42

now its your turn to send the response...

JudgeComrade 17

Wednesday 3 December 2014 2:42

Willing to bet it was a dare.

tomorrow89 13

Wednesday 3 December 2014 2:58

I guarantee you this was a group idea.

captainsmegma 12

Wednesday 3 December 2014 3:55

Just curious, but how do you know their your hubby's pubes?

eman526 8

Wednesday 3 December 2014 3:55

Man.. That sucks balls!

stormstarcj 12

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:15

Better hope they're his and not some other woman's!

laden_swallow09 34

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:28

Not so much an FML, but more like a WTF, methinks.

MissBehavin77 18

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:34

At least he thought of you enough to send you something.

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If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 22

Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 530

You deserved it 45 199

The Top

Today, my boyfriend pointed out that the water bill is getting kind of high. I suggested that we shower together to save water. He said he'd rather deal with the high water bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 175

You deserved it 4 073

Today, I waited for the single bathroom for a very long time. I finally knocked on the door and found no one was in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 019

You deserved it 9 231

Today, I received a notice that if I don't move the abandoned vehicle from outside my house it will be repossessed at my expense. My car isn't abandoned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 899

You deserved it 4 245

Today, my husband finally admitted that he squandered the last three months of my share of the rent on booze. He then blamed me, demanded more money, asked for a divorce, and stormed out. When he returned he asked, "How am I the bad guy?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 612

You deserved it 2 272

Today, my batshit crazy downstairs neighbor threatened me with "legal action" for making too much noise. According to her, it’s "illegal" for people in upstairs apartments to use vacuum cleaners, therefore I must sweep my carpets to avoid disturbing her and her imaginary guests. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 120

You deserved it 136

Today, my fiancée called off our wedding at the last moment, because her neurotic sister thinks she's "too fat" to be the maid of honor, and says she needs several months to lose weight. So that's a few thousand dollars wasted. My fiancée says I'm "overreacting" and that I "just don't get it". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 259

You deserved it 3 337

Army dudes

Same thing different taste

Good one, thanks

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