Weird, Delivery and Love: Army dudes

Army dudes

By Anonymous - 02/12/2014 17:39 - United States - Glendale

Today, I received a package from my deployed husband. It contained a scarf, a letter, and a bag full of his pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 346

You deserved it 4 216

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/07/2009 06:31 - United States

Today, I opened some small cute birthday gifts at my boyfriend's house. As we left to go out, he slipped me a Tiffany box and said he wanted me to open it in private. Flushed and excited, I open it to find a ziploc filled with hair. It was his mustache I had been begging him to shave for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 803

You deserved it 20 454

By marisa - 05/01/2013 00:31 - Ireland - Carlow

Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 242

You deserved it 4 316

By btchzloveit - 29/09/2011 12:27 - United States

Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 265

You deserved it 2 414

Good one, thanks

By zackeryburch - 03/08/2013 13:01 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 488

You deserved it 6 551

By marriedtoatool - 26/12/2012 06:15 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I received from my husband for Christmas the body lotion that only he uses. And nothing else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 702

You deserved it 2 947

By Anonymous - 11/06/2009 13:24 - Australia

Today, I was about to go and take a shower when I saw a pair of scissors taped to the door at eye level with a note from my boyfriend saying "Time to trim that hairy thang down under." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 533

You deserved it 55 963

By same - 21/11/2015 06:39 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 800

You deserved it 6 878

By steakysteak - 12/03/2010 15:06 - United States

Today, I got a package in the mail from my girlfriend. I was really excited until I realized that it was just a box full things that I gave to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 202

You deserved it 2 491

By CJ - 12/08/2016 01:02 - Canada - Lethbridge

Today, I was looking for a moustache comb, couldn't find it anywhere. Then I noticed it in a basket by the toilet with scissors. My wife's been using it to trim her pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 177

You deserved it 2 314

By ChopSuey - 01/06/2016 04:02 - United States - West Monroe

Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 912

You deserved it 1 626

Welshite 39

Wednesday 3 December 2014 0:10

Now you need to put his pubes in a locket so you can wear them around your neck and remember him forever. It's the ultimate romantic gesture.

kimg0885 23

Wednesday 3 December 2014 0:13

Make a scarf out of the pubes and send it back to him for Christmas!

Comments

TheOnlyMizLiv 22

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:34

Please, please tell us what the letter said. I've never wanted a follow-up so badly.

Kramer1998 20

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:35

At least he is... Alive

bunny409 14

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:41

be thankful. It could have been his dogtags...

meganikans 14

Wednesday 3 December 2014 4:56

Plot twist: they aren't his.

maharb01 17

Wednesday 3 December 2014 5:12

this sounds an awful lot like a unit joke, or some foreign national customs inspector's idea of a joke, unless the letter shed any light?

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 3 December 2014 5:35

It the thought that counts

RageAndLove5 4

Wednesday 3 December 2014 5:50

What did the letter say

ducky45 20

Wednesday 3 December 2014 7:53

Ew. I was not expecting that

noah4477 6

Wednesday 3 December 2014 8:37

kristen5286 12

Wednesday 3 December 2014 8:57

Ewww!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 443

You deserved it 3 015

Today, the guy I'd been talking to online and liked came to my house party with a bunch of mutual friends. He spent the night sitting in the corner on the sofa talking to my cat. I woke up later to see that not only had he crashed for the night, but he'd curled up in the dog basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 685

You deserved it 9 289

The Top

Today, trying to do something nice for my brother, I filled up his truck's gas tank. I didn't realize until too late that it's a diesel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 293

You deserved it 22 182

Today, I found out my boyfriend had bought me sexy lingerie for our anniversary. However, they're for for a bigger bust. When I asked if I could return it for the right size, he asked me to get a boob job to fit the bra instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 002

You deserved it 242

Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 125

You deserved it 3 412

Today, I came early from my job, just to find my boyfriend in bed, with my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 136

You deserved it 114

Today, I went on my first date in seven months. We hit it off really well, having a lot of things in common. The only thing we don't have in common is a tan line from a wedding ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 424

You deserved it 1 171

Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 101

You deserved it 3 261

Army dudes

Same thing different taste

Good one, thanks

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