At least you tried, son

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Canberra

Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform her, I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 279
You deserved it 3 264
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

Zebediabolical 39

"I didn't try to chloroform THIS ONE" You should get together with the guy who wants anal. You will probably be pretty good friends.

405 3

Comments

hushhh 4

That's what I was thinking.

72 3
Hoopachi 19

That's what the government wants you all to think

62 1
jessi_sunshine 26

That's what society wants you to think.

33 4
Badkarma4u 17

That's what SHE said.

30 2
killer6969 16

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
5 26
HeWhoIsNameless 9

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
5 20
LOLouis_fml 24

That's what i've been trying to say...

27 0
Bono363 11

That's what FML want you all to say.

18 2
iAmDictionary 13

That's what Big Brother wants you to think.

20 2
AshesNicole623 17

What would Jesus think?

6 2
llamarrama01 21

Don't feel sad, you took her breath away!

111 2
Zebediabolical 39

"I didn't try to chloroform THIS ONE" You should get together with the guy who wants anal. You will probably be pretty good friends.

405 3
MrSassypants 33

"Good friends and a threat to society." They should get that on matching t-shirts.

54 1
Zebediabolical 39

With any luck they will chloroform and molest each other. Like would happen in any good bromance movie.

15 31
tarlax 11

"Molest" each other? Wtf? Good first comment, terrible rape-y second one. If you think molestation's funny, you probably think Freddy Got Fingered is the best movie ever.

35 7
MrConcise 34

No limits in comedy, don't even defend yourself. Hell, even your profile picture is rapeish. They should expect this extreme style of humor from you.

5 35
MELKOZAR 27

This is the best comment I have ever read.

1 7
Shieldsam 15

That's it, we've officially gone meta

3 1
worldclassrager 39

Practice makes perfect...if you stayed at her side she knows you care...keep trying OP you'll get one soon

9 4
alain4343 26

how the **** did u make her laugh so she can have an asthma attack

2 20
okokalright 15

It's really easy actually. Have you ever had a moment where you laugh so hard you can't breathe?

16 0
ionab101 21

I have asthma and it's actually super easy, I get to the point of wheezing nearly every time I laugh

15 0
mimi_animee 18

Pretty easily actually. I once gave my younger brother an asthma attack from tickling him. Needless to say I wasn't allowed to touch him for a while after..

1 1
ukeandfoodislife 19

The emphasis on "this one". On the other hand, I don't think it was cool for her to openly laugh at you. That was rather rude and I think she could have concealed her laughter until you walked away, to be courteous.

15 3
LeBandit 20

this is when one would need smoke bombs...when the date is going poorly just HIIIYA smoke bomb whooosh and disappear

24 1
Silly_Lilly6969 23

This one? 0.o it's bad manners to chloroform anybody sir

23 2
Dreamsorrow93 24

Unless you are a biochem student.

3 1
WOTAN1488 24

Lol try the internet, or being normal in your approach

7 2