Intimacy: Bassface - FML

Bassface

By ohnoooooo - 03/10/2009 22:29 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I watched my boyfriend's band play a gig. I also found out he pulls the same faces playing the bass as he does when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 638

You deserved it 4 978

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Same thing different taste

By Dgama - 17/11/2018 16:00 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I went to see my new boyfriend play in a band. I found out that groupies don't like even bass players having girlfriends. I was attacked by one because he smiled at me from the stage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 661

You deserved it 165

By DepressedCellist - 27/09/2018 12:00

Today, my boyfriend and I had band practice for our duo. I've been playing cello for almost a year and wanted to incorporate it. He picked it up for pretty much the first time and sounded surprisingly good. I was excited until I realized he sounded better than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 538

You deserved it 526

By atleasthelistened - 09/03/2016 08:04 - United States - Spokane

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 547

You deserved it 2 451

Man City

By EpicBunBun - 10/05/2017 18:00

Spicy

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, I thought he went to change the music on his phone. He'd actually stopped mid-action just to check sports scores. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 269

You deserved it 719

Handjob

By Anonymous - 20/11/2019 18:00

Spicy

Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 059

You deserved it 906

By Embarassed - 30/08/2009 05:25 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had to explain to my father why most of the bar was giving him dirty looks at a concert. His air guitar motions made it look like he was jacking off under the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 347

You deserved it 3 038

Disinterested

By lily - 13/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 347

By thunder thighs - 11/02/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 506

You deserved it 6 292

Zigazig Ah

By Anonymous - 17/12/2017 01:30

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my fiancé while he was masturbating to the Spice Girls movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 377

You deserved it 809

By goldie09 - 18/02/2010 17:36 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 798

You deserved it 5 233

Next

Top comments

greenltrn2003 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 1:55

at least we kno theres 2things that give him an orgasam (possibly) next time he walks in the room you should be naked, slappin da bass...see what face he makes then

geppy 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 1:43

Why is this a FML? It just means he *really* enjoys playing the bass guitar. Or that you fail at sex, in which case YDI.

Comments

Ssgsolbo13 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 8:27

FLOP this is not a fml! the jokes on his dumb ass!

Zimmer_483 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 8:41

myTouch 1st, i hope.

iamelrebel 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 9:02

how is this an fml? it's kinda hot that he does that...

Einstein714 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 10:18

lame, stupid, moronic

andrewms 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 10:58

wow, I didn't know john mayer's girlfriends of 30mins post on this site...

vampire13 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 17:19

i share your pain my bf is the same with his guitar >.< but its no big deal just live with it !

GrumbleMuffin 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 23:28

My boyfriend does that. I found it humorous. He wasn't too amused when I told him though. :P

collectivebitch 0

Monday 5 October 2009 1:58

Oh dear lord; I'm dating a drummer I know how you feel... but drummers are worse. I honestly can't look at my boyfriend with a straight face when he plays drums.

ifinishlast 0

Monday 5 October 2009 13:36

maybe music to his is orgasmic. or while you guys are goin at it maybe he thinks of slappin' da base to turn him on because of your displeasing physical attributes...

strangepick 0

Monday 5 October 2009 18:59

welcome to the world of dating a dedicated musician. take it as a compliment if anything.

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The Top

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 259

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 2 713

The Top

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 547

You deserved it 11 908

Today, I was visiting my friend's new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughter's. I'm a 37 year old male. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 752

You deserved it 7 383

Today, at my job as a cocktail server in a bar, a group of good looking ladies sat in my section. As I was finishing up with the table next to them I overheard one of them saying, "I hope we don't get that guy, I want a sexy waiter tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 793

You deserved it 3 085

Today, I called a taxi after a night of partying. When it arrived, I realised I had no cash, so I told the driver I'd quickly grab some from an ATM. He made me leave my phone with him as collateral in case I was pulling a prank. He drove off the moment I turned my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 589

You deserved it 15 067

Today, my mom convinced me that she and my dad were getting divorced. I have anxiety problems, so I had a panic attack. She then laughed, and said, "Just kidding, I wanted to see your reaction. It's the best so far." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 071

You deserved it 3 878

Today, I learned a valuable lesson: Make sure you learn to swim at a very young age, or else you might end up a in a swimming class with a bunch 3 and 4 year-olds, taught by your crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 372

You deserved it 6 717