Bon appetit!

By Fattie - 28/10/2019 06:00

Today, I'm on a diet. I was compelled to start it when the only pet name my boyfriend could think of for me yesterday was, "My baby elephant." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 590

You deserved it 289

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Same thing different taste

By Glutton - 28/01/2010 01:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I started our diet. After a long day of being held accountable for every calorie I ate, I went home to sneak a snack. My boyfriend came over to surprise me, and found me on the couch shoveling left-over Indian food into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 261

You deserved it 49 615

By Pita - 04/12/2010 20:35 - United States

Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 376

You deserved it 6 577

Early learner

By Courtney Micallef - 02/04/2020 08:00

Today, I was teaching my one year-old some new words. He pointed to the picture of a pig and said, "Mama". Guess I better start that diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 511

You deserved it 334

By Anonymous - 16/08/2009 17:14 - United States

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 113

You deserved it 10 955

Taking advantage

By Stigmamma - 28/06/2020 05:06

Today, after 3 months of my man claiming he's going to start eating better "next week", he finally went on a diet. What changed? I started eating healthy while trying for a baby. He is "supporting me" by getting me to do extra meal prep for him too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 354

You deserved it 353

Milkmaid

By Heifer - 16/05/2009 21:41 - United States

Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 954

You deserved it 21 342

By Voltron - 11/01/2012 00:37 - United States

Today, I have to go on a diet, because I can't afford to buy bigger clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 783

You deserved it 37 619

By Anonymous - 14/10/2013 18:19 - United States - El Paso

Today, I decided to start a new and healthy diet. When I came home from my run this morning, my family decided to show their support by buying takeaway food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 523

You deserved it 4 772

By Anonymous - 19/06/2019 00:04

Today, for the third time, my boyfriend called his dog by my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 548

You deserved it 244

Food fight

By hss - 30/05/2011 01:59 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 889

You deserved it 49 756

Ashamed_Sister 60

Monday 28 October 2019 7:21

Since you're a man he could have tried to compliment you for your elephant-like trunk...

manb91gb 15

Monday 28 October 2019 9:32

****! You beat me to it!

Comments

Ashamed_Sister 60

Monday 28 October 2019 7:21

Since you're a man he could have tried to compliment you for your elephant-like trunk...

manb91gb 15

Monday 28 October 2019 9:32

****! You beat me to it!

elle0000 13

Monday 28 October 2019 11:30

Could be worse, he could have said “my white elephant”

mfranks19891989 10

Monday 28 October 2019 13:56

Hi baby Elephant!

JackWood 20

Tuesday 29 October 2019 3:02

You should have said "That's Daddy elephant to you!"

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I agree, your life sucks 53 830

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