Break-ups and Love: Crossed purposes

Crossed purposes

By knee2tak - 14/03/2009 09:46 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend, "We need to talk." He said, "I know". So we met after school, and he said he was OK with me breaking up with him, that he wasn't that into me either. He said all that before I could tell him that my parents wanted to meet him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 361

You deserved it 11 286

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By ihateguys - 26/09/2014 19:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 967

You deserved it 4 007

Off the top of my head…

By helplesslover - 04/10/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called and said he was stopping by to talk. I didn't understand why he would stop by, so I asked if he was going to break up with me, he said no. Half an hour later, he knocked on my door to break up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 136

You deserved it 5 753

By justmylife - 21/08/2010 04:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years called my house even though I was with him at the time. He needed to talk to my mom. He asked her to break up with me for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 741

You deserved it 3 152

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 15:16 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend called my parents to let them know I broke up with him. He was sobbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 709

You deserved it 10 283

By me - 12/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I had only been dating him for about a month. Thinking he wouldn't take it very hard, I invited him over so I could tell him in person. Little did I know he was going to start crying on my couch and not leave for 5 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 145

You deserved it 10 738

Is this Brexit?

By Anonymous - 05/09/2019 05:03 - Canada - Toronto

Today, in the same sentence, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to "spend the rest of his life with me," and "I want to break up with you because I can't face your family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 848

You deserved it 169

Nice victim blaming, dude

By Awkward - 26/11/2021 16:58 - Netherlands

Today, I had to tell my boyfriend his dad was sending me inappropriate texts that made me feel uncomfortable. I tried to make him stop, but he kept going until I felt like I needed to tell my boyfriend. Who's now broken up with me because of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 123

Bad timing

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my boyfriend that I wanted to go separate ways. Before I could say anything, he proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 074

You deserved it 3 755

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 23:16 - United Kingdom

Today, wanting to break up with my boyfriend, I invited him to dinner with my parents. I was sure they'd hate him, which would give me the excuse I needed. They ended up loving him, and now they won't stop mentioning marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 726

You deserved it 53 083

Feelings

By Anon - 19/10/2020 07:57 - United States

Today, my parents told me, after 30 years of marriage, that they are getting a divorce. I went to my boyfriend's apartment because I needed some comfort. While sobbing to him, he decided to dump me on the spot because my reaction to the news was "immature" and he wants an "adult" relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 713

You deserved it 367

plethora 3

Saturday 14 March 2009 16:15

I'm pretty sure "we need to talk" is a universally recognised code for "I'm about to break up with you".

urie 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 16:14

lol who says "we need to talk" before telling your bf that you want him to meet their parents? seriously.

Comments

Kamicase 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 19:29

"We need to talk" is never(!) a good sentence and therefore shouldn't be used. Lesson learned! But I hope afterward you said: "Actually I just wanted to say that my parents wanted to meet you." : P

Lou_Briccant 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:11

You can't blame him when you use a phrase so vague and ominous like "we need to talk."

AlyshaDeShae 10

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:27

"We need to talk" is not always bad. I told my best friend that the other day and not only did he not think it was something bad, he agreed and said, "Yep, we sure do!" "We need to talk" means exactly what it is. That someone feels that you need to talk. In regards to my best friend, it had just been a while since we had a real and intelligent conversation because we goof off so much and I wanted to tell him about what had actually been going on without massive amounts of silliness. I can honestly say that I've never said "we need to talk" as a precursor to dumping someone or telling them anything bad. I normally say something along the lines of, "I don't think we should see each other anymore," or "I have some bad news."

texmas 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 22:10

You know, this is why you're a dumbass. You'd probably still have a boyfriend if you'd started with almost anything else.

wrestler_fml 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 22:14

#34: HE'S YOUR FRIEND NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND!!!! OF COURSE THAT'S OK THEN!! What- did you expect your friend to disown you or something, or think that you were somehow breaking up with him when you aren't going out? NO! The "we need to talk" = "im breaking up with you" rule ONLY APPLIES when 2 people are going out! go swallow arsenic and save everybody else the trouble

ari_lee 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 22:40

Unless your parents wouldn't approve of him or something how would telling him your parents want to meet him even NEED a long discussion (if you didn't know that "we need to talk" is usually synonymous for breaking up with someone).