Health, Break-ups and Love: Give it back - FML

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Give it back

By aliixmaee - 09/08/2011 14:50 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 4 years broke up with me. She took everything, including the kidney I gave her a year ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 051

You deserved it 6 398

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Same thing different taste

By MexyBoy - 13/08/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 8 months and I broke up. We decided to give back everything we ever bought for each other. I gave her the stuff she bought me and when I asked for my stuff she said she'd sold it and spent the money on herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 862

You deserved it 6 605

By killmenow - 19/02/2009 21:52 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 307

You deserved it 3 495

By nadette - 25/05/2009 16:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She told me that her father didn't approve of me and forced her out of the relationship. Her father died 2 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 705

You deserved it 3 980

One last thing…

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She came over to see me one last time. We hugged for minutes and cried; it was a touching moment. Just after she left, I realized my wallet that I had on the table beside us was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 043

You deserved it 4 965

Her revenge

By Anonymous - 25/02/2020 22:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 723

You deserved it 784

By whysheheartless - 03/11/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 916

You deserved it 3 069

The GOAT

By stunned - 15/03/2010 15:27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of almost a year and a half broke up with me when he decided he wasn't in love with me anymore. We gave our stuff back, he was joking and happy the whole time until I told him I was taking back my cat. At that point he burst into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 910

You deserved it 3 964

By ouch - 16/06/2016 10:14 - United States - Livonia

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 391

You deserved it 2 021

By Anonymous - 05/01/2014 19:44 - United Kingdom - Alfreton

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for another guy. Last week, she wrote sweet things like "Love you forever" and "Light of my life" on my arm cast. I have to wait two more weeks until it's taken off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 038

You deserved it 3 922

By Anonymous - 13/05/2015 17:20 - Canada - Qu?bec

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 957

You deserved it 2 774

Next

Top comments

Snaylor12 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 18:56

Just take it back

heyhihello95 12

Tuesday 9 August 2011 18:57

You can remind her that there will always be a piece of you inside her.

Comments

jerico616 14

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:25

Damn! Do you have a tattoo of her name as well?

hellokimmiee 5

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:25

What you expected her to give it back?

bwblackw 2

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:27

Wow that sucks

LA13x 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:31

The kidney part sucks......but live and learn I guess - don't give your partner something that you can't take back...

LA13x 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:31

The kidney part sucks......but live and learn I guess - don't give your partner something that you can't take back...

Egnar 19

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:34

I don't see how it's bitchy of her - What part is bitchy?. . .That she left someone that she no longer felt compatible with?. . .Or the part where she accepted his kidney while they were still dating and likely in love a whole year ago?

kablooey_01 3

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:35

Freak her out one day and tell her you put a tracking device in it. nah, but seriously, did she at least thank you when she left?

ToeJams 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:36

if they can't rip your heart out the'll take the next best thing

redchik100 1

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:37

Remember what goes around comes around :)

some1azn 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 20:38

You gotta be kidney-ing me...

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The Top

Today, I went to gather the laundry out of the dryer. My daughter had seen my wife put bleach in the washer, so she decided that honey in the dryer would make the clothes smell sweet. She wasn't wrong, but now I have a giant ball of sticky socks and underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 839

You deserved it 2 834

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 253

You deserved it 11 943

The Top

Today, I saw my ex for the first time since we broke up. We were on a train next to each other for 6 hours, to a festival where our tents were pitched next to each other. We're here for 5 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 446

You deserved it 2 413

Today, I found out I got HIV. I’ve used condoms with all my Tinder hookups and never shared needles or anything with anyone. I was supposed to have a Tinder date tonight. Guess I’ll just be single forever then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 321

Today, I went to confession. I told the priest that I had an intimate relationship with a woman that I'm not married to. He chuckled and said, "You know, lying is a sin too." I wasn't lying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 672

You deserved it 9 581

Today, my psycho sister came home. Why did she leave? To manipulate my parents to let her live here rent free. My mother built her a new bedroom, twice the size of my unit, so she can fuck my ex with privacy. She earns 4 times what I do, but doesn't have to pay rent. I own the house with mum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 157

Today, I live in dorms and found out everyone is leaving for Christmas break. I also found out my student loan didn't go through, so now I cant afford to go visit my family that lives over 7 hours away. I guess I'll be spending Christmas alone in a dorm room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 760

You deserved it 236

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 685

You deserved it 8 736