Kids, Birthday and Drunk: Here, have this

Here, have this

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 873

You deserved it 4 909

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Same thing different taste

By Devotedmom - 10/01/2016 09:07 - Belgium - Li?ge

Today, I got up at 5 am to bake a surprise birthday cake for my 16-year-old son. I put the cake on the table and went to call my son. "Surprise!" When I came back 30 seconds later, the cake was all gone and the dog was licking his lips. My son won't even believe I made a cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 058

You deserved it 3 120

That blows

By Anonymous - 12/09/2022 23:30

Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 204

By Needasafe1234 - 25/09/2009 15:24 - United States

Today, it was my mother's birthday. My 5 year old brother and 85 year old grandma decided to decorate the house with balloons and a blow up "people" they found in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 034

You deserved it 46 804

By Anonymous - 15/11/2012 14:54 - United States - Erie

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 550

You deserved it 49 541

Competition

By JaneDoe - 04/04/2013 02:51 - United States - Salisbury

Today, it was my friend's birthday, so I baked him a cake complete with his name written on it in homemade frosting. After I gave it to him, his mother berated me for it, saying I should have checked with her first before making a cake for her son. He's 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 756

You deserved it 2 788

By thissucks - 21/02/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 572

You deserved it 3 419

By sunflowercake - 23/08/2009 23:10 - Canada

Today, I made a very pretty sunflower cake that I woke up incredibly early to make. It took me hours and a lot of money. It was for my grandparents anniversary and my whole family was invited. We only got to see the remains because the waiter gave it to the wrong family, and they ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 946

You deserved it 2 378

By as-salamu alaykum, motherfucker - 05/04/2014 22:04 - United Kingdom - Birkenhead

Today, I was having my birthday party. My dad showed up late, blind drunk, and drove his car straight through my garage door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 163

You deserved it 3 513

By I'm so sorry... - 01/03/2017 16:00

Today, a coworker left a chocolate cake on the "free food" table in the office. I had a slice. She's just called to ask if she left her grandmother's birthday cake at work. She made it from scratch. Now I'm baking a new cake in the office kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 683

You deserved it 1 531

By bestbirthdayever - 24/08/2010 07:18 - United States

Today, I was at my sixteenth birthday party. My guests consisted of my grandma who I live with, and my 2-year-old cousin she was babysitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 772

You deserved it 4 222

abbyycarper 13

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:16

Well you at least got ham

Crazafon 19

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:20

She obviously isn't a baker, but she sure is baked!

Comments

Turtle_rebellion 10

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:24

I'll take ham over cake any day!

Olympiakos10 15

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:25

Bake me a cake as fast as you can. If you are late you can come with ham.

ILoveMyArm 15

Thursday 8 August 2013 17:25

And we will eat it with the fam. Yep, that's the jam.

CallMeMcFeelii 13

Thursday 8 August 2013 17:35

Damn, you guys are on a slam.

apache316 6

Thursday 8 August 2013 20:49

I know, Olympia commented quick like bam!

Wowxoxo 17

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:25

Your grandma listens to too much Kanye West, but she just wanted the party to go H.A.M

CorpsmanUp88 21

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:28

and the polish strikes back.

thatnucca 36

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:29

At least she wasn't dancing on the dinning table with her top off... But **** your sons life for seeing that though....

rocker_chick105 31

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:33

Benefits of ham: Protein, the kid won't go crazy after eating it, it's not as messy, bacon. And you're complaining?

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:38

Well at least she brought candles

StraightEdge325 11

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:41

I love me some ham!

kelseythompson 27

Thursday 8 August 2013 17:58

To bad its not your birthday haha but ham is good, just not for a five year old when he expected a cake, to a five year old ham < cake ..

redbandit9877 12

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:45

It could be worse, she could have just brought the pig.

darkangel21492 10

Thursday 8 August 2013 16:48

I think the kids could have had fun with the pig.. not so much with ham...

queerdragon 20

Thursday 8 August 2013 21:53

There are a lot of things that could have gone wrong. 1. She could have burned down the house by lighting the candles. 2. She could have brought a pig and slaughtered it in front of all the children. 3. She could have gotten into a car accident and died, forever leaving little Billy to feel like her death was his fault. Plus, he is five, it will be very easy to make up the lack of cake to him.