Health, Awkward and Skincare: Hypochondriac

Hypochondriac

By Stepheroni - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, I went to the doctor to ask what the weird white lump was on my back, and if it was cancer. He told me it was the biggest pimple he'd ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 836

You deserved it 686

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Same thing different taste

Panic

By not a cancerous pimple - 31/01/2015 00:11 - United States - Chester Springs

Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 327

You deserved it 27 405

By ringrash - 14/01/2016 06:17 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I finally went to the doctor's office to have a small patch of acne on my stomach looked at. Since it was in an almost perfect circle and abnormally sensitive, I was worried it could be ringworm or some other sort of skin infection. It turned out to be an infection alright. Herpes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 030

You deserved it 4 365

By tooembarrassed - 12/02/2016 15:13 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was cuddling with the man I've been seeing, and he started caressing the mammoth of all pimples on my back. He continued fondling me while lecturing me on the dangers of skin cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 194

You deserved it 1 994

Ethics in medecine

By Savannah - 07/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Spring Hill

Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 865

You deserved it 595

Freaked out

By Why - 09/04/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, there is a huge lump on my neck. I thought it was a boil, but it didn't seem to hurt at all, nor was it bothersome. It wasn't until my mom pointed out its existence and size one too many times that I started to feel uncomfortable, and now suddenly I can't sleep at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 190

By ultraattitude - 14/06/2012 19:34 - United States

Today, I went to see my dermatologist friend for a free consultation on my terrible acne. During my visit, she said I probably won't be getting any more pimples. Excited, I asked her how she could tell. She replied, "There's no more room for it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 151

You deserved it 2 676

By stoolgal - 23/09/2016 06:19 - United States - Yukon

Today, I found out after a lot of panic and a visit to the gynecologist that the lump in my vagina isn't cancer. I was just constipated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 505

You deserved it 1 448

Skincare

By Anonymous - 08/09/2021 05:00 - Germany - Dresden

Today, I have a new scar on my chin, which is still very sensitive to pressure. So, naturally, my body considers this the perfect spot for growing what feels like the world’s biggest pimple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 103

Skin care

By Username - 24/11/2010 01:40 - United States

Today, I woke up early and went to the dermatologist's, only to have them tell me that the skin condition I have that causes big, white spots to appear is chronic and I can do nothing about it. But they did give me cream for a different skin condition they found. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 432

You deserved it 2 408

By Leashaness - 15/09/2012 11:07 - United States

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast." That's not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 354

You deserved it 2 757

Eashy 16

Thursday 13 April 2017 18:13

Well at least you don't have cancer

cacheson 41

Thursday 13 April 2017 18:32

Maybe you should submit it as s Guinness world record.

Comments

Eashy 16

Thursday 13 April 2017 18:13

Well at least you don't have cancer

aquapearl736 16

Thursday 13 April 2017 18:28

That's a really pessimistic way of looking at being told that you don't have cancer...

aquapearl736 16

Thursday 13 April 2017 18:29

That's a really pessimistic way of looking at being told that you don't have cancer...

cacheson 41

Thursday 13 April 2017 18:32

Maybe you should submit it as s Guinness world record.

ZoroMiHawk 25

Thursday 13 April 2017 21:34

better to know

AnthonyCS5 19

Thursday 13 April 2017 22:26

Eeeewwwwwww! Just Ew!

blahblahla 7

Thursday 13 April 2017 22:47

While those are great news, its still nasty as hell!

Akitakat 31

Thursday 13 April 2017 23:33

Have the doc put it on video & onto YT. There are people who love watching zits & blackheads popped.

brendejafulable 41

Friday 14 April 2017 8:02

Me me meeeeee

brendejafulable 41

Friday 14 April 2017 8:02

Me me meeeeee

Yudith 24

Friday 14 April 2017 12:35

Have a baker prepare cupcakes in the likeness of your zit to celebrate the fact that you do not have cancer! Apparently, when you squeeze them, French vanilla custard comes out.