Animals and Work: I'm not getting paid enough for this shit - FML

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I'm not getting paid enough for this shit

By Username - 20/10/2010 18:08 - France

Today, at work, my boss made me spend a hour trying to catch a baby raccoon in the parking lot. I'm a bank teller. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 664

You deserved it 3 497

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 18/09/2010 06:31 - United States

Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 461

You deserved it 2 932

Darwin smiled

By Ihateracoons - 06/09/2022 06:30

Today, I saw a raccoon family on my front porch. There were 3 little babies. Wanting to keep one as a pet, I scooped up one of the babies. The mother raccoon turned around, made a bizarre roaring, hissing sound, and attacked me. I’m currently in the ER covered in grass and scratches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 5 332

Not so cute

By Anonymous - 01/12/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I tried to pet what I thought was a cute cat under my porch. As it turned out, it was actually a raccoon. It hissed at me, and I screamed so loud that my neighbors came running. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 443

By and god shat - 11/07/2014 23:38 - United States - Klamath Falls

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 299

You deserved it 9 093

Good intention, mid outcome

By Britany - 16/03/2025 18:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to rescue a stray dog and used my work ID to lasso him. I scooped him up and was carrying him to my car when something spooked him and he ran off with my work ID. I eventually found him and traded him a granola bar for my work ID, but not before I reported it missing to my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 452

By anonymous - 13/09/2012 06:02 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I found an enormous raccoon in my backyard. After a couple of nasty scratches, I finally managed to capture the filthy animal. After calling animal control to relocate it, I waited for hours to learn that "relocating" actually means releasing it into my front yard 10 feet away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 792

You deserved it 4 667

By shaviTuT - 07/02/2013 19:44 - Malaysia - Bandar Penggaram

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 457

You deserved it 2 674

Surprise, MFer!

By Anonymous - 04/09/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I went to use a public restroom. I walked into the first stall and found it occupied… by a raccoon. It hissed at me, and in my panic, I backed into a janitor's cart, knocking over the mop and bucket. I had to leave the bathroom drenched in dirty water while a crowd of people watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 105

Batman

By Anonymous - 05/10/2021 23:00

Today, at work, someone found a bat indoors. I offered my help. They shouted, "Let someone with the right expertise do it." I volunteer as a bat carer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 132

By Anonymous - 16/01/2010 09:10 - Australia

Today, I was on a job trial at the local pet shop and, naturally, was doing all the disgusting jobs. As I was cleaning the kittens' litter in the cat enclosure, someone thought it would be funny to lock me in there. I sat in a giant cage in the middle of the store with people laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 480

You deserved it 3 103

Next

Top comments

krushr 3

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:04

Maybe he thought it was a bank robber?

w2z1 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

It was wearing a mask!

Comments

some1call911 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 5:22

You can say no, catching animals probally ain't in ur job description he can't fire u if u say no, I'm 14 and I know this you SHOULD to

maddymeat 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 5:24

When I was a bank teller I had to chase after a rooster one day. You would be amazed how many people said "you know you've got a rooster walking around out here?"

Ellen_Farrah 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 5:59

aww <3

cladams91 1

Thursday 21 October 2010 6:15

haha was it my mom?

alex1432 9

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:38

you should capture it and raise it as your own. Train it to fetch things for you, and even better, teach it to steal money so he can siphon some out of your boss's wallet.

persimmon 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 8:00

baby raccoon, squeeee!

Tankman07 2

Thursday 21 October 2010 10:19

look at it this way, your being paid to chase a raccoon I stead of dealing with people...

Naitras 15

Thursday 21 October 2010 13:23

sounds like something my boss would do... however I would find it amusing

peachezthelette 22

Thursday 21 October 2010 17:20

When I had my job at this resturaunt my boss made me do jobs that were the waitresses' job.. All I did was take orders over the phone.

dearprudence89 7

Friday 22 October 2010 1:17

Is your boss Michael from ''The Office''>?

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You deserved it 213

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I agree, your life sucks 57 133

You deserved it 4 469

The Top

Today, while at a restaurant, my three year old daughter pointed at an African-American girl and yelled out “She’s ugly because she’s black!” Me and my wife got dirty looks for the entire rest of our meal. We have no idea where she learned that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 912

You deserved it 605

Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 957

You deserved it 4 766

Today, my boyfriend of six days proposed to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 257

You deserved it 12 455

Today, I finally had my tongue piercing heal up so I decided to try oral on my girl. Unfortunately, she has a hood piercing that got caught on my tongue ring, and neither of us could get them apart. We had to call my mom in to solve the problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 194

Today, my friend called me freaking out because of an online pregnancy test. She was scared because she had no idea that she was pregnant, let alone having a fifteen-pound baby. The website is a joke. She goes to an Ivy League school, and I couldn't even get into community college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 035

You deserved it 4 185

Today, I had to leave the movie theater early because I couldn't fit in the chairs. I guess I'll see it when it comes out on DVD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 365

You deserved it 57 667