Dogs and Animals: It hurts when I pee - FML

It hurts when I pee

By yomamma787 - 24/11/2009 17:11 - United States

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 896

You deserved it 54 454

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 31/08/2014 17:51 - United States

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 513

You deserved it 3 876

Shout the victory

By dogpatch087 - 02/01/2020 03:00 - United States - Ventura

Today, while climbing a mountain, I got to the top and then put both of my arms up in a victory kind of way only to trip on a rock and fall into a cactus plant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 784

You deserved it 504

By Anon - 24/03/2012 02:42 - United States

Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 411

You deserved it 32 292

By thanksdad - 16/03/2014 19:28 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 818

You deserved it 6 292

By Username - 15/07/2011 19:51 - United States

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 202

You deserved it 7 944

By Anonymous - 29/02/2012 16:52 - United States

Today, I rescued a cactus from a lethal fall. It thanked me with a handful of spines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 409

You deserved it 32 996

By mraow123 - 30/05/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 394

You deserved it 4 660

By Broderick - 26/03/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 072

You deserved it 6 961

By Chandler - 16/09/2011 19:26 - United States

Today, in a desperate bid to avoid going to the doctor, my young son ran into and hid inside a cactus garden. I had to drag him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 847

You deserved it 2 936

By Koko - 07/04/2016 16:07 - Germany - Berlin

Today, my dog was so happy to see me that he laid down on his back and started pissing like a fountain. He pissed on everything around him, including me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 784

You deserved it 1 942

Next

Top comments

Brave_Sir_Robin 4

Tuesday 24 November 2009 20:04

What a prick.

Stumblebum30 5

Tuesday 24 November 2009 20:24

do you think the world is your toilet? dumb ass

Comments

Dopeyrox 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 21:59

what an idiot. even if all the bathrooms in your house are occupied you take a piss on a cactus?

darkmis1 17

Tuesday 24 November 2009 22:04

Why were you peeing on a cactus?

CyclonePsycho 1

Tuesday 24 November 2009 22:07

Okay, so I'm going to ignore the obvious "WHY?!" nagging at the front of my brain for a few seconds. Instead I'm to ask "Why a cactus of all things? Why not a bush? Or grass? Or anywhere that's not near a cactus?"

CallMeHush 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 22:19

Once again for those that ask why. If you have a penis the world is your urinal.

macbenz 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 22:34

fyl dude.

clockworkrainbow 3

Tuesday 24 November 2009 22:52

It's a symptom of living in NM... The desert is tough. FYL, dude. I'd have peed on a cactus too if I wasn't a girl. I've seen it happen. Brave girl... Crazy people around here.

Cm4marinebmf 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 5:59

Hello

leigh247_fml 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 23:17

YDI for peeing outside

xdrumkid101x 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 23:21

FYL, but why in the world were you peeing on a cactus?

nicolearredondo 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 23:39

Why the hell were you peeing on a cactus?

gigi2009 0

Wednesday 25 November 2009 0:00

f*ck you.

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Keywords

Animals Cats Gross Health Relatable Poopoo peepee Parents Creepy Kids Scary Mental health Miscellaneous Cold weather Embarrassing Love Dating Tinder Cute Work Transportation Cops Awkward Crush Sports Teachers Education AITA Weddings Public freakouts Mother in law

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I agree, your life sucks 37 875

You deserved it 8 031

Today, I found out my teacher writes descriptions next to people's names on the register to remind him who people were. By mistake the descriptions appeared on the computer projector. Next to my name it said "Tubby". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 000

You deserved it 5 417

Today, I accidentally dropped my birth control pill. My cat ate it before I could pick it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 352

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