Health, Painful and Injury: JESUS CHRIST!

JESUS CHRIST!

By rubmytummy - 10/06/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About halfway through, I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 813

You deserved it 23 353

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Same thing different taste

By PlsForget - 18/08/2016 21:47 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 666

You deserved it 1 293

Self report

By Bonk - 04/02/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 186

Dumb, but relatable

By Maju - 31/10/2019 04:00 - Netherlands

Today, I hit my toe against a table. Out of frustration, I kicked the table and broke my little toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 2 736

You're grounded!

By Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 138

Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 014

You deserved it 9 307

By Jopes - 10/05/2009 12:44 - United States

Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 714

You deserved it 13 715

Always wear protective gear

By Anonymous - 06/06/2020 14:02

Today, while nailing a board down, I hit my thumb with the hammer. As I reached to console my throbbing finger, I dropped the hammer on my foot. When I went down to hold my foot, I smacked my head on the board. Now I've got a concussion, a smashed finger, and a bruised foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 692

Dumpstered

By KO: - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was changing the garbage at a local fast food place where I work. Being a rather short guy, I had to lean back and fling the full, heavy bag at the top. I did so with such force that my head hit the dumpster, knocking me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 945

You deserved it 5 243

ARE YOU ******* SORRY?

By Evelyn - 19/03/2012 20:18 - United States

Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 508

You deserved it 7 897

What? How? Why?

By Anonymous - 17/03/2021 22:01 - United States - Boise

Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 309

Poonheart 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 2:02

That must have shattered your shin... -.-

justxmyxluck 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 2:06

I'm cringing just reading this. Well at least you didn't hit your crotch. That would just about kill you. =/

Comments

TotallyAwesome 0

Friday 12 June 2009 10:03

Did you break it?

Asdas_fml 0

Friday 12 June 2009 17:44

#206 "#2: God's not real, ergo I have no one to answer to about my life. Ergo, I make shitty moral decisions in places where I otherwise wouldn't have." #2: God's not real, ergo you have no one else than yourself to answer to about your life. Ergo, you can't blame your mistakes and bad decisions on your imaginary friends and actually have to take responsibility. Also, there is no afterlife, ergo you have to do what you need to do while you're still alive, because there is no happy happy place waiting for you after you die.

milkradio 0

Friday 12 June 2009 23:22

Oooooooooooooh man, I sucked the air in through my teeth while reading this. I hope you recover soon. That sounds painful :(

RazorbladeSmiles 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 6:20

All for the good of the Lord. FYL.

dotVillain 1

Saturday 13 June 2009 6:50

You deserve it for believing in a deity (:

metro_mello 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 20:39

Reply: Do i have to get my stfu dust and sprinkle it on you? What does his religion have to do with him hurting his knee. Really dumb asses these days idiots shouldn't be aloud to mate!

DieterDerBlau 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 10:43

Wow, and God didn't save you??? Suck...

atomicmrpelly 2

Saturday 13 June 2009 11:24

oh jeez can someone please shut down comments?! Why is it that every time an internet nerd sees something about God the just have to leap in and make snide comments?! It's really tedious!

tari_joon 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 16:58

Wouldn't that have like, shattered your leg? o.O

tari_joon 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 17:00

Also, LOL @ #210

MrFranBrO 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 21:18

you must be ******* retarded as hell because when you swing that thing and miss you usually hit the floor because you lean forward to strike thus making you hit the floor not keep swinging and hit yourself.. Your are ******* retarded as hell go learn to be useful in life cause you are failing epicly