Movies, Scary and Love: Jump scare - FML

Jump scare

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 055

You deserved it 14 020

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Same thing different taste

By toni405 - 21/07/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 774

You deserved it 11 474

Scary

By xHoho - 26/11/2013 05:50 - United States - West Fargo

Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 325

You deserved it 8 729

By Nick - 22/05/2018 01:30

Today, my girlfriend and I went to see a horror movie. It ended up scaring her so badly that she refused to leave our bed all night long, even to pee. I have to clean the mattress now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 877

You deserved it 758

By pussyface96 - 19/09/2012 09:27 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I asked a girl I like to the movies. Wanting her to lean on me and stay in my arms during the movie, I chose a horror film. I screamed like a pussy the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 608

You deserved it 44 559

By Anonymous - 12/08/2012 09:23 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 152

You deserved it 2 367

Peaky Bladders

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 17:01

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house, dying to pee during a thunderstorm. Ran to the bathroom, but it was occupied. A huge thunderclap scared me pretty bad. When the door finally opened, my girlfriend's mom walked out, laughing. I realized the thunder scared me into peeing my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 460

You deserved it 454

Spooked

By Anonymous - 20/10/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to sleep when I saw a head looming from the darkness with no eyes and a mouth open like a silent scream. I just froze and pissed myself. It was my daughter wanting to cuddle with us. Alas, the bed was wet, so she got put back in her bed, while we had to share the sofa downstairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 312

You deserved it 257

By locksmack - 14/06/2009 12:46 - Australia

Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 897

You deserved it 58 063

By Ariel_Mariaa - 04/11/2011 23:25 - Canada

Today, I went to see the latest Paranormal Activity movie with my mother. We were terrified and held hands at one point. The person sitting behind us thought it would be hilarious to abruptly scream into my mother's ear. She reacted by flailing and driving her arm straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 534

You deserved it 4 288

By Bianka05 - 19/07/2017 20:00

Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 992

You deserved it 962

Next

Top comments

1800getalife 0

Sunday 31 January 2010 20:04

you gf is the man of the house...

boatkicker 4

Sunday 31 January 2010 21:09

It's impossible to pee yourself when you're startled? Completely not. You know how when people are startled they often involuntarily flinch? Well now consider that you have a rather full bladder, but are waiting for a better time to get up. Involuntary muscle twitch of the wrong muscles, makes it entirely possible to wet yourself.

Comments

TruleighSadistic 0

Monday 1 February 2010 3:16

wow either your truly hot or its tru love cause.. i might of left your ass.. if you were my man.. but then again idk i date bitches n e ways.. she might of thought it was sexy you never know.. did you escuse yourself before she found out or did you soak the couch also..

caits13 0

Monday 1 February 2010 3:19

Aww poor thing. Hope it went okay after because if she was 'pissed' (lmfao) about it, she's not worth it. Unless of course she's good sex.

Z1LVER 0

Monday 1 February 2010 3:33

haha then don't watch scary movies

dancecheerluv 0

Monday 1 February 2010 4:03

hahahahaah!

lestatsgirl27 0

Monday 1 February 2010 4:10

hahahahahahahaha

hotboy977 0

Monday 1 February 2010 4:40

pffffffhahahahaha dude next time, take some pullups lmao

connor86 0

Monday 1 February 2010 5:33

wow

fmlqueen123hahah 0

Monday 1 February 2010 5:41

hahaha ouch

FightOfYourLife 0

Monday 1 February 2010 6:20

number 28 has hot abs

SoccerPlaya17 0

Monday 1 February 2010 6:38

who actually believes this?

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Keywords

Poopoo peepee Cats Animals Gross Smells Love Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Work Christmas Social Media Grieving Music Anniversary Boredom Intimacy Ironic Abuse Transportation Drunk AITA Am I overreacting? Alcohol Kids Parents Gun control

The Top

Today, even though my bitch of a baby mama makes ten times what I make, the courts are still forcing me to pay child support for the two kids I never wanted. I’m way too busy with my life to have custody of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 914

Today, my girlfriend is mad I won’t indulge her “Sleeping Beauty” fantasy. She doesn’t want me to just kiss her, she wants me to full on fuck her. Call me crazy but I just can’t get it up for a passed out person. Yes it’s consensual, but it just feels uncomfortable. She doesn’t get why I’m not into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 172

You deserved it 358

The Top

Today, I had an interview for a pretty interesting job. Everything was going smoothly until I referred to their company by the wrong name, not once, but three times. They politely corrected me each time, but I could see the resentment in their eyes, especially because it was the name of their main competitor. I probably won't be getting the job, huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 774

Today, after waiting two days for my ADD med because of "insurance issues", I was told it's out-of-stock. I have one pill left, and the pharmacy isn't open on the weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 934

You deserved it 174

Today, I tried to put a drinking glass on the top rack at the dish sink where I work, but lost my grip. The glass then fell into my coworker's face, the bridge of her nose to be exact. X-rays confirmed that I broke her nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 131

Today, the sprinklers in the hotel room came on and stayed on. There was no fire. My family is currently living in the hotel, so everything we own is soaked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 918

You deserved it 2 912

Today, I participated in a charity auction at my university where the boys are "sold" to the highest bidder to be a slave for a day. My girlfriend and ex were bidding against each other. My ex won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 616

You deserved it 5 651

Today, I heard the sounds of women grunting in the living room. My husband knows I don't like him to watch porn, so I confronted him. He was masturbating to professional Women's tennis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 173

You deserved it 26 350