Embarrassing, Poopoo peepee, Clumsy and Miscellaneous: Keep it down

Keep it down

By Andy - 13/05/2012 02:21 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 504

You deserved it 4 371

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Same thing different taste

You OK in there?

By stinkypants - 10/11/2011 03:15 - India

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 788

You deserved it 11 865

By Pisspants - 17/09/2016 04:39 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 144

You deserved it 2 839

AKA taking a screenshot

By Anonymous - 05/10/2020 11:02 - United States - White Plains

Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 109

You deserved it 395

By Peepants - 03/03/2016 23:03 - United States - Huntsville

Today, I really had to pee during one of my college lectures. I finally worked up the nerve to leave the room while he was lecturing, and ran frantically to the bathroom. Once in there, the urge intensified to the point I couldn't hold it. I peed my pants while standing in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 077

You deserved it 4 729

By pissingcontest - 30/05/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 649

You deserved it 46 029

By sarahrachel - 15/12/2015 03:30 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 039

You deserved it 5 053

How smelly is your piss?

By Anonymous - 08/04/2021 21:00 - Finland

Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 154

By Blie - 04/09/2018 20:30

Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 051

You deserved it 4 193

By Anonymous - 11/07/2010 18:18 - United States

Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 735

You deserved it 5 470

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 028

You deserved it 2 795

XHerobrineX 4

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:31

..... It couldn't have gotten any worse :)

ConnorBrown36 5

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:33

That would really piss me off

Comments

KingCeltic77 18

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:37

You try to be as quiet as possible, and you are louder than a construction. On top of that, you pissed yourself. FYL.

Angelrose2004 17

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:00

It always seems to be the quieter you try to be, the more noise you end up making. But look on the bright side, OP. Everybody didn't stare and laugh... I hope.

nofearjenshere 12

Monday 14 May 2012 5:38

I love you. ^

anoellem 1

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:41

At least you didn't pee yourself when you tripped :)

tennisrapper1 14

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:45

Well, at least you didnt get kicked in shame by chuck norris!

ElricMustang 23

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:47

I thought stuff like that only happened to that socially awkward kid in movies.

HeyMondayAddict 4

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:50

Have a nice trip! See you next fall! :D

perdix 29

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:53

Tie a knot in it, chief.

DocBastard 38

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:04

I hope your host and your peers weren't too peeved at you, though it would have been better not to have made a peep. At least you had some peece and quiet outside where no peeping Tom could peek at your peenis.

maniaccrab 0

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:34

Good job. You found a pun, where there was none. You put the pee, in penis. Then the pee in peace. Except inside there was no peace, and outside, he took the pee out of his penis. :P

zingline89 18

Sunday 13 May 2012 7:45

52 - Urine idiot

Devin91 20

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:04

Although that is embarrassing it could've been way worse seeing as how you could've peed on yourself or fell on top of someone as you tripped and then managed to pee on them.

nofearjenshere 12

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:31

Your pants are dangerously low there, buddy.

MysticKnight 3

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:47

33- why are you always focusing at places where you should not be focusing at?

nofearjenshere 12

Sunday 13 May 2012 6:52

Hmm, what do you mean, MysticKnight?

SpicyDuck 22

Sunday 13 May 2012 9:58

33, why complain?

SkoomaKi 27

Sunday 13 May 2012 11:45

#70 - I certainly don't want to see an almost naked guy in the FML comments. There's not need for it!

Keevarou 17

Sunday 13 May 2012 11:56

Some men just have the urge to expose themselves. And I could not agree more with the half naked statement, you don't need to be ripped and half naked to be a hot guy :) Some guys have natural beauty, not implying that being ripped is not natural. But really no need to show it off on FML, it's that kind of stuff I did when I was 14 or so, or I may just be really weird. Anyway! That's my two cents.