Intimacy: Kinky

Kinky

By LaLa - 09/01/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 779

You deserved it 7 876

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Same thing different taste

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 156

You deserved it 4 025

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 08:29 - United States - Inglewood

Today, I tried to be cute by sitting on top of my boyfriend's belly. While getting on top, I accidentally kneed him in his nuts. In pain, he jolted his head up and ended up banging his head against mine. Now I have a black eye and he can't walk without waddling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 912

You deserved it 44 397

By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 563

You deserved it 4 579

By caligirl921 - 11/12/2010 06:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. When I orgasmed, my leg flew out and I accidentally kicked him in the balls. For the next ten minutes, he lay in the fetal position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 079

You deserved it 21 123

By Foxy - 05/02/2009 14:06 - United States

Today, I had just gotten over the flu and thought I was better. So me and my boyfriend decided to have sex. As I was about to orgasm, I puked all over his face. He was so disgusted that he ended up throwing up on me as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 333

You deserved it 26 876

By Toomuchisoutofcontrol - 21/01/2017 08:00

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend. I'm usually in control and do my own thing. He tried taking control and I ended throwing up on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 585

You deserved it 1 010

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 764

You deserved it 13 688

My pleasure

By never again - 29/07/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, a bit buzzed, I finally gave in to my boyfriend's request and gave him a rimjob. I was licking away when I suddenly realized what I was doing, leapt off the bed, and ran to the toilet to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 450

Bad timing

By oh no - 29/01/2013 14:51 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 489

You deserved it 3 463

Cool moves, bro

By Anonymous - 30/06/2012 09:45

Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 364

You deserved it 5 691

deviable 9

Monday 9 January 2012 12:07

So since you didn't have sex I guess you decided to "hit the sack"? Eh? No? Ok then.

emvictoria 9

Monday 9 January 2012 11:56

I bet that's going to turn him of kinky stuff for a while.

Comments

Burning65 5

Tuesday 10 January 2012 13:14

Lol this is the shit man.

jjesuslover 0

Tuesday 10 January 2012 21:27

Smoooth butterfingerssss

sarah2144 14

Wednesday 11 January 2012 0:39

Wow, that's definitely kinky. XD

Trebie 6

Wednesday 11 January 2012 0:56

Well if that isn't kinky, then I dunno what is.

redredblood1 7

Wednesday 11 January 2012 5:35

Hmm, sounds kinky ;D

lovestheice 0

Wednesday 11 January 2012 6:45

Haha that was God saying " marriage first!!!"

rissgoesrawr 0

Wednesday 11 January 2012 6:50

This made me seriously LOL xD classic

AugustBurnsToast 14

Wednesday 11 January 2012 10:08

Now that's kinky lmao

profoundkisses 18

Wednesday 11 January 2012 14:00

Good for you.

UnluckyDude96 8

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:33

Ooouch :O

Keywords

Cute Love Surprise Awkward Texting My ex Wanker Intimacy Sex Health Insomnia Sleep Mental health Cooking Food Kids Weekend Parents Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Technology Zoom Coworkers Argument Roommate Animals Cats

The Top

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 849

You deserved it 83 220

Today, I found out why my ex of three years started an argument with me that quickly lead to our break-up. He said he would be talking to people of a different race to make life "easier." I should've seen the fact that he dislikes our own race from prior conversations. He ended up getting into a relationship two months later. FML

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The Top

Today, I was travelling in a car. As I was discreetly picking my nose, we drove over a speed bump. It hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 303

Today, I just found out that I was missing almost $500 from my debit card. Turns out my brother used my card to simp on a streamer. When I confronted him, he said, "But you would have simped on her either way." FML

I agree, your life sucks 841

You deserved it 144

Today, my wife and I got back from our cruise ship holiday. It was intended to be ten nights of relaxation and romance. The first five nights she had her period, and the next five nights I had painful welts on my tip from the mess in my swim shorts. Ten days later, no sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 092

You deserved it 460

Today, my husband's daughter told us that she's 5 months pregnant. I'm going to be a step grandmother and I'm only 23 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 136

You deserved it 48 297

Today, my boyfriend is wearing a t-shirt and shorts. I'm wearing leggings, sweatpants, a vest, t-shirt, jumper and hoodie. If we turn the heating any higher, he starts overheating and sweating. At the current level, I'm still shivering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 284

Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the sidewalk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 751

You deserved it 5 737