Intimacy: Kinky

Kinky

By whatever - 23/03/2009 06:46 - United States

Today, I was on a third date with a girl. Things had been going really well. At one point, the conversation lulled. After a moment of silence, she asked me what my greatest fantasy was. I told her that it was being a superhero. She told me that she meant sexual fantasy. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 746

You deserved it 67 842

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Honesty is the best policy

By Anonymous - 19/06/2020 02:00

Today, I finally went on a date with a girl I've been talking to for 2 years. She is my dream girl, picture perfect and I love her with all my heart. So I asked her, half jokingly, if I was her dream guy. Her reply? "Don't ask me something you don't want to hear the answer of." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 424

You deserved it 1 259

Batman ruins another relationship

By Anonymous - 24/12/2021 11:01

Today, my girlfriend asked what my sexual fantasy was, and I said Catwoman. She got disgusted at me, because according to her, Catwoman is 15 years-old or something. Turns out she has only seen Gotham, featuring Catgirl as a teenager, and not the grown-up Halle Berry version I was talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 600

You deserved it 224

Pleased to meet y'all

By rokkstarrrVRV - 28/12/2013 08:42 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I took a girl on a date. Her and her imaginary friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 329

You deserved it 5 165

By Anonymous - 10/02/2015 14:51 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 496

You deserved it 20 915

Conversational skills

By no_leather_of_any_kind - 07/04/2009 07:08 - United States

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 526

You deserved it 9 702

Snoozefest

By notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 542

You deserved it 19 407

Moments of wonder

By secret123 - 24/02/2009 11:01 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were watching some show about sex on the discovery channel. The topic of female orgasms came up and she said, "Wow, I wonder what that's like?" We've been dating and sexually active for three years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 212

You deserved it 19 168

By tacoboy - 21/08/2009 08:06 - United States

Today, I was on a date with a girl I've had feelings for since I was 14 (I'm 22). I took her out to dinner, then to a movie that we both liked and had a few drinks afterwards. I thought it was going really well until I was driving her home and she asked to be dropped off at her boyfriend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 199

You deserved it 6 592

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 11:40 - United Kingdom - Chatham

Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 379

You deserved it 3 435

By LoveStinks - 18/08/2016 10:56

Today, I asked a girl what time she'd like me to pick her up for our date tonight. She didn't know what I was talking about. It seems like, after months of sweaty palms, nervous smiles, and awkward sentences, I only dreamed she said yes to going out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 227

You deserved it 2 579

Jaywin 3

Monday 23 March 2009 16:09

Smooth one, man. But I do agree with you. Superpowers would kick an immense amount of ass.

BooYou 0

Monday 23 March 2009 16:09

Shoot...i would have probably said the same thing.....

Comments

Elusive_fml 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 6:32

Should have said superhero roleplay for the save. She's obviously into kinky shit if she's asking that question on the third date. Way to fail, rookie.

xrideacowboyx00 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 6:40

Ok I ******* love you for that answer! I would have adored it if some guy said that to me!

12mp04 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 7:10

It was a 3rd date... don't you think it would've been a little forward of him to automatically assume she meant sexual fantasy?

grosie 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 7:41

ahahah thats cute xx

citylights 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 8:24

hahahah naw that's adorable :)

nodbor 11

Tuesday 24 March 2009 9:05

!. I'm 50 and still have sex on my mind. Men think about it every 2 minutes. 2. The third date is usually the do it date if you are both really into each other. 3.??? 4. Profit from what you now know what she meant by that question. PS. Use a double strength condom that can deal with your superpowers.

maiden_girl 5

Tuesday 24 March 2009 9:58

LOL @ #6. I bet Batman gets some ten times over... but I mean come on that's great and funny. She didn't specify sexual fantasy so it isn't your fault.

Fmylif3 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 10:43

hahaha. I'm a swimmer and I wear a speedo. Your superhero fantasy is golden.

vox_temperantia 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 11:22

I am curious as to how she responded exactly. "WTF? That answer's not perverted enough for me!" I dunno, I can't see that happening, and that's really one of the few honestly negative reactions I can imagine that would make this worth posting here.

Emika_fml 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 12:37

That's an awesome answer! But hardly a FML. I assume from "things had been going really well" that after your answer, they stopped going so well... but so what? Use it as an opportunity to find a better girlfriend!