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By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Hopkinsville

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks 46 698
You deserved it 4 325
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Top comments

Cazz91 21

I bet that was quite an eye catching sight to see.

350 13
DocBastard 38

You should sell your boyfriend to the circus. Not because of his crazy eyeball trick, but just so you can get rid of the idiot.

262 13

Comments

Gho5tk3y 17

What the ****?! That's weird and wrong on several levels.

31 3
Kkkdawg 27

How do you even figure out that you can do that? Do you just think to yourself "let's just try some weird shit and see if it works/doesn't kill me"?

91 0
Enslaved 36

Maybe in the past he sneezed with his eyes open and then *pop*? I tried to do it just to see what would happen but can't. I always end up closing my eyes. -.-

17 1
falon142012 22

That's because it's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. Or so I've always been told.

7 4
kozzard 17

not impossible but really hard mythbusters did an episode on it

6 0
JustinKirby 20

That's eye popping! I'm not good with these puns :/

54 9
beaverteaser 16

man I would love to be able to do that. that way when a girl says ( I'm up here) boom pop them eyes out

19 4
UsernameTaken14 18

Not trying to sound dumb... But what exactly does "OP" mean? I see it a lot and I was just wondering. Thanks!

18 16
xxsakuraxx 29

**rolls*eyes** It means original poster.

6 34
Bentonic 11

Opioid Problems Oh Poop On Psychotropics Old Parents Overdone Pickles

3 10
Googolman 29

I don't understand why the people who actually try to help always get thumbed down. Sure, one can simply look it up on Google, but that's no reason to be immature and give out false/foolish answers.

19 11
ChevyRedneck85 13

#95 & #100 go to Wal-Mart an buy a sense of humor

1 2
worldclassrager 39

That's not right...he'll probably pay for it later if he does this so much...

6 3
buckdharma 37

Jeepers creepers where'd he get those peepers? Gosh all, git up, how'd you get the shit up?

42 1