Christmas, Cats and Animals: Merry Xmas

Merry Xmas

By Christmas sucks - 24/12/2012 01:03 - United States - Boston

Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 881

You deserved it 4 771

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Same thing different taste

By wjones - 15/12/2009 15:06 - United States

Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year old guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 518

You deserved it 33 769

Alexa, play the Christmas album by Low

By Anonymous - 20/12/2022 03:00

Today, to try to have a less depressing Christmas, I've put up a small tree in my apartment and wrapped some presents for myself. I woke from a nap to the sound of my cat vomiting. What did she throw up on? The presents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 882

You deserved it 194

Cartoonish

By Anonymous - 16/12/2021 02:01

Today, my kid jumped from the couch into our Christmas tree. As she literally slid down the entire tree, it was like it was happening in slow motion. I was laughing so hard, I peed myself, so I had to clean up decorations and my own piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 494

A cat called Bruce

By Dave - 24/12/2024 12:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, we spent hours decorating the Christmas tree, perfectly balancing the lights, ornaments, and tinsel. Ten minutes later, the cat thought it was a right time to reenact Die Hard and climbed up the tree, knocking it over. Now my ornaments are shattered, and my cat is smugly sitting in the wreckage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 306

You deserved it 211

Stolen valor

By Anonymous - 15/07/2009 06:58 - Canada

Today, my husband rescued our daughter's cat from a tree. She spent the next hour clapping and telling me how much of a hero he was. Last night at 2 a.m., I was awoken by meowing and had to rescue the same cat from the same tree, in the dark, and halfway down he shit on me. No one called me a hero. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 968

You deserved it 5 955

By DarkDisaster - 27/12/2012 10:16 - United States

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 276

You deserved it 8 227

React content

By fmlfmlfml - 02/06/2009 18:03 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 963

You deserved it 252 005

Christmas Chaos

By shaggyberaddy - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I spent 15 minutes trying to get my cat out of our seven-foot Christmas tree. Once he was done, he tore about the house and broke the nativity scene, beheading baby Jesus and a wise man in the process. The tree is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 809

You deserved it 1 050

By Julie - 25/12/2012 03:20 - United States - East Brunswick

Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 209

You deserved it 2 791

By childdreamkiller - 08/12/2011 17:41 - Canada

Today, I took my daughter to see Santa at the mall. When I went to pick her up from Santa's lap, my watch snagged on his beard, pulling it off in front of my daughter and about twenty kids in line. My daughter still isn't speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 305

You deserved it 5 199

RevengeIsSweet 11

Monday 24 December 2012 9:27

This close to the actual holiday, I don't think it matters much.

xlord 27

Monday 24 December 2012 9:32

Wow. I find it amazing how you would know that this exact same thing would happen if you owned a cat.

Comments

Nicostream 16

Monday 24 December 2012 23:03

And people still laugh when I'm telling them, that their cats are trying to assassinate them.

capnbzarr 43

Tuesday 25 December 2012 6:41

Either your "cat" is a puma and your tree is 20 feet tall, or you're too feeble to get out from under a little old Christmas tree, or you're just an attention *****.

songtrees 8

Tuesday 25 December 2012 6:50

Scratch one cat.

Rezorate 5

Tuesday 25 December 2012 6:50

It's ok, some people don't get shit.

fallenangel72 7

Tuesday 25 December 2012 7:12

This would be the perfect time for the grumpy cat meme

deequu 20

Tuesday 25 December 2012 7:21

Why would you wrap the presents at home when you know she's home? I usually do mine in the boot of the car or when everyone is asleep in a safe area, where if I hear someone, I can quickly hide the presents.