Sports and Fight: MMA FML

MMA FML

By ThatEndedWell - 07/01/2019 22:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 164

You deserved it 4 613

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

The harder they come

By andre - 24/12/2021 20:01 - United States - Federal Way

Today, after training for six months in martial arts, I was ready to stand up against my bully. When he approached me. I found out the hard way he’s been doing martial arts since he was six. I didn’t know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 253

You deserved it 457

Badass

By Anonymous - 12/04/2016 12:29 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my friend invited me to his boxing club for the first time. Since I'm somewhat short and scrawny-looking, he was worried that the workout would be too difficult for me. I waved him off and told him that I was tougher than I looked. Five minutes into class, I sprained my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 951

You deserved it 4 947

Ultraviolence

By Noname - 05/02/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I finally stood up to a bully who had been messing with me for over a year. His response? He picked up the chair I was sitting in and threw me across the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 194

You deserved it 4 177

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 161

You deserved it 54 041

By Anonymous - 13/02/2013 22:29 - Canada - Etobicoke

Today, I finally confronted my bully. Too bad it was at my high school reunion and he beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 087

You deserved it 5 733

By Karate Kid - 25/05/2012 06:29 - Australia - Surry Hills

Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 972

You deserved it 35 378

By Anonymous - 30/10/2015 22:22 - United States - Saint Peters

Today, I finally stood up to the guy who's been bullying me for the last 2 years. Even though he's been caught in the act several times, he never gets punished, so I figured I'd get away with gut-punching him. Nope. An hour later, I was suspended from school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 882

You deserved it 2 649

Cobra KO

By WeakBitch - 18/02/2018 15:00

Today, during a judo session, I was paired with a thin, frail-looking rookie. Before a mock skirmish, as I'm much bigger, I said I'd take it easy on her, but also to give it her best shot. She immediately threw me on my face to the floor, knocking me out cold in 7 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 779

You deserved it 7 641

By fthislyfe - 02/07/2011 14:06 - United States

Today, while arm wrestling with my boyfriend, I had to pretend he beat me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 349

You deserved it 7 950

Unfortunate coincidences

By FBI1236 - 07/07/2019 20:00 - Pakistan - Karachi

Today, I finally stood up for myself and beat the crap out of a bully at school, as my father told me to do. The kid and I were called to the principal's office, along with our parents. Inside my father's smirk faded when he saw that the kid's mom was his boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 664

You deserved it 227

whiskey'swino 15

Tuesday 8 January 2019 6:01

Fighting at work can get you fired. Running your mouth off and getting your ass whooped will get you laughed out the building. Which is worse? You ****** your own life here, more ways than one.

coolmike699 26

Tuesday 8 January 2019 6:44

Jocks and fights? Is this a workplace or a high school?

Comments

whiskey'swino 15

Tuesday 8 January 2019 6:01

Fighting at work can get you fired. Running your mouth off and getting your ass whooped will get you laughed out the building. Which is worse? You ****** your own life here, more ways than one.

manb91uk 22

Tuesday 8 January 2019 6:44

You're not really a thinking kind of person are you?

coolmike699 26

Tuesday 8 January 2019 6:44

Jocks and fights? Is this a workplace or a high school?

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Tuesday 8 January 2019 19:19

It actually could be both when you think about it. They could be staff members of a high school.

WeirdUS 29

Tuesday 8 January 2019 6:54

Wow the ladies must be beating on your door. Grow up YDI

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 8 January 2019 7:59

“Having started” taking classes? You’re not ready to fight right away! That’s like a pre-med student performing open-heart surgery.

Mungolikecandy 19

Tuesday 8 January 2019 9:20

Violence, a stupid response to begin with if your life is not in danger. Also just started taking MMA classes? It is probably that anyone proficient as a street fighter would take you down until you are a way into it never mind a beginner.

alycion 38

Tuesday 8 January 2019 9:51

Why would you challenge anyone at work? And fighting is used in self defense and sport only. Not to prove you have a pair. I’d be more ashamed of the weakness that let him get under my skin than getting my ass kicked.